Top 10 Jurassic Park Characters That Got What They Deserved
#10: Gunnar Eversoll
“Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” (2018) A wormy auctioneer, Eversoll doesn’t care how dangerous a product is as long as he makes a sizable profit. This includes dinosaurs that have been taken from Isla Nublar. Eversoll agrees to auction off the prehistoric beasts on the black market, knowing full well that they’ll be weaponized. Aside from only caring about money, Eversoll isn’t even a good auctioneer, talking at a snail’s pace with no charisma and losing control of the crowd when the Indoraptor is presented. After the dinos break out, Eversoll doesn’t hesitate to push aside a woman, whose screaming alerts the Indoraptor. While Eversoll inputs the elevator code, his carelessness ultimately gets him mauled to death along with three others. We’d say wrong floor, but his comeuppance feels so right.
#9: Dr. Robert Burke
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“The Lost World: Jurassic Park” (1997) When Peter Ludlow plans to take dinosaurs from Isla Sorna and put them in a San Diego zoo, he enlists Dr. Robert Burke as dino expert. As a quote-unquote expert, Burke should’ve known that bringing dinosaurs to a populated city would be a recipe for disaster. He also should’ve known that “Compsognathus triassicus” is an inaccurate term. Above all else, Burke should’ve known that a T-Rex is deadlier than a snake. When a snake gets too close for comfort, though, Burke panics and walks directly into the T-Rex’s mouth. Although Burke was passionate about paleontology, his compliance with this ill-advised mission makes his downfall feel justified. It also backs up the theory of Burke’s real-world inspiration, Robert Bakker, who believed the T-Rex was a predator.
#8: Ken Wheatley
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“Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” (2018) This mercenary deserves a painful demise for a variety of reasons. He hunts down dinosaurs to sell on the black market, takes their teeth as trophies, and delights in seeing living creatures in pain. On top of all that, Wheatley makes one of the dumbest decisions in a franchise full of bad calls. Stumbling upon the caged Indoraptor, Wheatley decides that his necklace needs one more tooth. Thinking that he’s sedated the hybrid dinosaur, Wheatley wanders into her cage and starts yanking on one of her teeth. It isn’t long until the Indoraptor is yanking off Wheatley’s arm. The Indoraptor doesn’t stop there as the hunter fittingly becomes the hunted.
#7: Vic Hoskins
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“Jurassic World” (2015) In the “Jurassic World” movies, turning the dinosaurs into weapons becomes a popular trend. This bone-headed idea starts with InGen’s head of security, Vic Hoskins. When all hell breaks loose, it becomes evident why dinosaurs wouldn’t be the best military assets. Even when they’re trained like Owen’s raptors, they can be unpredictable. After his field test fails miserably, Hoskins still remains committed to using the dinosaurs in war. Thankfully, Hoskins’ pretentious monologuing is interrupted by a raptor that proceeds to give him a satisfying end. Kingpin can survive a lot of things, but even he can’t bounce back from a raptor attack. The ultimate irony is that Hoskins was better at running security, the dinosaurs wouldn’t have gotten out in the first place.
#6: Velociraptors
“Jurassic Park” (1993) With a character like Vic Hoskins, we find ourselves rooting for the raptors. When youngsters Lex and Tim are in peril, though, our sympathy naturally lies with the children. As the kids seek refuge in a kitchen, two raptors wander in for a snack. Fortunately, Lex and Tim are smarter than most of the adults in these movies. They lock one raptor in the freezer, meaning the beast likely froze or died from starvation. It isn’t the last time that our heroes are confronted by raptors, but in an unlikely twist, the T-Rex provides their salvation. Raptors strike again in “The Lost World.” A T-Rex doesn’t come to the rescue this time, but you know what’s even deadlier? A kid gymnast and a window!
#5: Peter Ludlow
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“The Lost World: Jurassic Park” (1997) Despite essentially being responsible for everything that goes wrong in this franchise, we have a hard time hating John Hammond. The same can’t be said about his weaselly nephew, Peter Ludlow. Where Hammond wanted to give the world something extraordinary, Ludlow’s only concern is avoiding bankruptcy. His master plan: do Jurassic Park again… but in zoo form! The snooty Ludlow gives little consideration to the well-being of the dinosaurs, the people he’s hired for this life-threatening operation, or the civilians who could be potentially endangered. When the T-Rex and his infant are unleashed upon San Diego, Ludlow becomes a small appetizer for a growing dinosaur. But hey, at least humanity learned from Ludlow’s mistakes and nobody ever tried something like this again. Right?
#4: Eli Mills
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“Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” (2018) Almost twenty years after Ludlow brought dinosaurs to the US, Eli Mills does the exact same thing. Instead of putting the dinosaurs in a zoo, though, Mill plots to sell them as weapons and make money, money, money! Basically, he’s a combination of Ludlow and Hoskins, making Mills one of the easiest villains to despise. Not only does Mills get numerous people killed, but he personally murders Benjamin Lockwood to keep him quiet. We’re not sure why Lockwood didn’t just call the police himself, but regardless, Mills’ backstabbing eventually catches up to him. Just when it appears Mills has evaded a stampede, he becomes a plaything in a tug of war between a T-Rex and a Carnotaurus. So, Maisie releasing the dinosaurs wasn’t all bad.
#3: Donald Gennaro
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“Jurassic Park” (1993) Donald Gennaro is much more ethical and heroic in the original novel, even making it off the island alive. For the 1993 film adaptation, Gennaro is simply a bloodsucking lawyer who wants to charge park visitors a fortune. Although some might argue the film version is more one-dimensional, this change results in one of cinema’s most satisfying deaths ever. As the T-Rex is about to escape the paddock, Gennaro darts out of the jeep, leaving Tim and Lex behind. Being greedy is one thing, but abandoning two kids without thinking twice is especially low. Gennaro pays for his cowardly ways as the T-Rex bashes into the bathroom, gobbling him right off the toilet. Hammond spared no expense, but he could’ve afforded sturdier stalls.
#2: The Indominus Rex
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“Jurassic World” (2015) A transgenic dinosaur that can camouflage herself, Indominus Rex is behind most of the carnage that occurs in “Jurassic World.” The Indominus chows down on various characters and gets the raptors to join in her path of mayhem. While we can handle most of the film’s human deaths, seeing what the Indominus did to a herd of defenseless Apatosaurus just breaks our hearts. What’s worse, the Indominus did that for sport. This beast needs to be put down and there’s only one other dino that can get the job done: The T-Rex. Even a Tyrannosaurus struggles against the Indominus, but with some backup from Blue and the Mosasaurus, death finds a way. At least the Indominus is now with her sibling… who she ate. Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions. Dieter Stark, “The Lost World: Jurassic Park” (1997) You Shock a Dinosaur, You’re Gonna Get Bitten Back Eventually Billy Brennan, “Jurassic Park III” (2001) He Survives, But Stealing Raptor Eggs Gets Him Some Really Big Boo-Boos Simon Masrani, “Jurassic World” (2015) Next Time, Let Somebody Else Fly… Well, We Guess There Won’t Be a Next Time The Indoraptor, “Jurassic World: Fallen Kingdom” (2018) Oh, Look at That, I’ve Been Impaled… And by Dinosaur Horns… Ironic, Huh?
#1: Dennis Nedry
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“Jurassic Park” (1993) Jurassic Park was always an accident waiting to happen, but Dennis Nedry sped up the impending disaster in no more than 18 minutes. Unsatisfied with his salary, this computer programmer agrees to steal dinosaur embryos for a rival corporation. Although Nedry is in financial trouble, he’s driven more by greed than desperation. Stealing from his employers is bad enough, but Nedry also deactivates the park’s security, putting everybody on the island in danger. You can blame Hammond for creating the park, but pretty much everything from this point forward is on Dennis, who doesn’t collect the rest of his cash. Similar to “Psycho,” the money is a red herring with Nedry meeting a watery end in a car. Just replace a knife with a Dilophosaurus.
