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Top 10 Most Pathetic Video Game Foes REDUX

VO: Dan Paradis
Script written by Kurt Hvorup Ugh, why do they even bother? Welcome to and today we’re counting down our picks for the Top 10 Most Pathetic Video Game Foes! Special thanks to our user “CoreyMcc11” for suggesting this topic using our interactive suggestion tool at http://WatchMojo.comsuggest

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Top 10 Pathetic Video Game Foes

Some enemies are built to challenge and impress – these ones are of a different, more disposable breed. Welcome to and today we’re counting down our list for the top 10 Pathetic Video Game Foes.

We’re diving into gaming’s wide history to pinpoint those video game adversaries that are most consistently used as common enemies with little-to-no survival instincts. Be they undead servants or oversized insects, these villainous creatures and beings prove that sometimes the universe is very cruel indeed.

#10: Grunts

“Halo” series (2001-)
Known among the other Covenant Empire races as the Unggoy, these diminutive little aliens prove little more than a minor nuisance. Grunts tend to be sent out in groups, fleeing from firefights should their group leaders be killed. Besides this tendency towards cowardice, the Grunts are also fairly frail and serve largely as replaceable cannon fodder whenever the Covenant shows up to cause trouble. With very limited strategic capabilities and a habit of killing themselves by way of self-detonated grenades, the threat posed by Grunts is negligible in most situations.

#9: Slime

“Dragon Quest” series (1989-)
Teardrop-shaped and always sporting a goofy smile, there’s certainly a charm to the dopey appearance of the Slime. They act as recurring foes in “Dragon Quest” games that – while occasionally taking on different attributes and abilities – remain consistently easy to best in a fight. Slimes lack the means to substantially harm others or defend themselves, ensuring that they are slain rather quickly in battle. Further, their abundance in the wild makes it so that players will likely encounter many Slimes over the course of each game, racking up a sizeable body count in the process.

#8: The Hollows

“Dark Souls” series (2011-)
If it weren’t clear enough before, being undead isn’t exactly swell. Yet that’s the existence faced by Hollows, poor souls left in a state of limbo between life and death. Looking rather emaciated, these zombie-esque beings are encountered quite early in “Dark Souls”… and are killed off with incredible ease. Some Hollows may be found to carry weapons but in general they attempt to strike out at the player with their bare hands. Their slim figure and lack of armor or sufficient shielding makes sure that any attempt by a Hollow to fight is quickly quashed.

#7: Poo Snakes

“Blue Dragon” (2007)
A silly name for a silly enemy. Resembling a perfectly formed pile of excrement, the Poo Snakes are ridiculous and difficult to take seriously, even before any actual combat begins. Once faced in battle, though, these purple reptiles reinforce their status as one of the weakest enemies showcased in “Blue Dragon”. The Poo Snakes have two moves at their disposal – one of which being a means of summoning more Snakes – and are limited to 8 HP. Charming though they may be, it’s clear the Poo Snakes aren’t intended as a major threat to players.

#6: Met

“Mega Man” series (1987-)
Since the First Mega Man game, the Met robots stood out with their quaint hardhat-adorned design and their ability to hide between firing shots. However, what they have in creativity is lost in their middling resistance to Mega Man’s weapons; the Mets can be taken out in one hit when not hidden. While their attack pattern of shooting three diverging bullets does lend them some means of repelling foes, the Mets remain fundamentally weak in every subsequent appearance they make. Those hardhats can’t save them forever, after all.

#5: Infantry

“Dynasty Warriors” series (1997-)
Well, guess you’ve got to have something – or someone – to throw endlessly at players. From “Dynasty Warriors 2” onward, this historically inspired series of hack and slash games focused primarily on offering wave after wave of nameless enemies in-between major battles. These Infantry provide the foundation for the series’ combat, being disposable and extremely quick to slay. Merely a few strikes from the player’s weapons will cut down Infantry in their tracks, the ease of which is made more noticeable by Infantry units rarely defending themselves. On the one hand it’s a bit sad to see hordes of soldiers so effortlessly slain… but on the other hand it’s relentlessly satisfying to be the one doing the slaying.

#4: Radroaches

“Fallout” series (1997-)
Initially encountered by the Lone Wanderer on his 10th birthday in Vault 101, Radroaches made their mark as a surprisingly large, heavily mutated variant of the American cockroach. Much like their real-world counterparts, Radroaches are able to survive levels of radiation that humans cannot… though that doesn’t contribute much to their overall survival. These mutant insects can be beaten to death simply with one’s fists, with human causalities only occurring when several Radroaches attack in unison. Protected by a mere five hit points, it takes only the right bullet or melee attack to put these creatures down for good.

#3: Goombas

“Super Mario Bros.” series (1985-)
Who ever said sentient brown fungi couldn’t be adorably incompetent? Although able to adapt to various types of terrain in the “Mario” games, the mushroom-esque adversaries known as Goombas lack basic defensive measures. They can only attack by walking back and forth into enemies, can be flattened to death when jumped on, and are particularly weak to the ravages of fire magic. Exasperating this is their implied lack of intelligence, as disguises like the Goomba Mask have proven effective against them. Thank goodness they’re amusing little never-do-wells, or they’d be truly pitiful.

#2: Glass Joe

“Punch-Out!!” series (1984-)
Oh Joe, how you try so hard yet fail so frequently. Joe first appeared in the original “Punch-Out!!” arcade game, where he was established as being a notably mediocre boxer hailing from Paris, France. The reason for his middling reputation soon becomes clear when the fighting commences – Joe’s easily knocked down and out during matches, due to his weak physical build and poor reflexes. Even as the games have progressed, Joe has usually been called upon to act as a tutorial combatant, somewhat explaining the easiness with which he is dispatched.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions:

“Secret of Mana” (1993)

Unarmed Thugs
“Batman: Arkham” series (2009-)

“DOOM” (2016)

#1: Magikarp

“Pokémon” series (1998-)
Fans of this series are likely all-too-familiar with the pitiful creature that is Magikarp, the 129th Pokemon in the National Pokedex. This fish-like Pokemon has one of the lowest base stat totals in series history, being notably deficient in health and attack power. What’s worse, Magikarp starts out with only one move at its disposal – Splash, which does no damage and has no effect on opponents whatsoever. Being a water type, he's naturally weak against Grass and Electric, but that barely matters since almost any strong attack can take him out easily regardless of type. In short, Magikarp is as pathetic as it is hopelessly outmatched, but at least it evolves into something awesome.

Do you agree with our list? Which video game enemies do you feel are the most pathetic? For more teasing Top 10s published daily, be sure to subscribe to

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