Top 20 Worst Hollywood Remakes Of All Time
#20: “A Nightmare on Elm Street” (2010)
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The story of Freddy Krueger has had a faithful following since Robert Englund first sported the razor glove and red and green sweater we’ve grown to love. Yet, it’s Englund’s undeniable charm that largely made the “Nightmare on Elm Street” franchise” so beloved by fans. That said, a recasting for the 2010 remake just didn’t work, despite the best efforts of Jackie Earle Haley. This is a horror icon that can’t hide behind a mask, and Englund’s legacy simply loomed too large for “A Nightmare on Elm Street” 2010 to stand on its own two feet.
#19: “Swept Away” (2002)
Madonna’s film resume is full of interesting failures, and discussion-provoking performances. 2002’s “Swept Away” sort of exemplifies both ends of this spectrum, while also serving as sort of a coda to The Material Girl’s attempts at acting. This remake of a much-beloved Italian film of the same name was the lowest-rated movie of Madonna’s career on the silver screen, with a five percent score on Rotten Tomatoes. Not even the directing talents of her then-husband Guy Ritchie could save “Swept Away” from being an embarrassing black eye for nearly everyone involved with the production.
#18: “Jacob’s Ladder (2019)
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This 2019 film was so poorly received at the time of its release, that many fans of the 1990 original aren’t even aware it exists. This is probably a good thing, however, as the OG “Jacob’s Ladder” still possesses a lot of power today. The cast of the 2019 iteration certainly seemed to try their best, but the original’s hallucinogenic imagery, not to mention the standout performance from Tim Robbins, makes it something of a cult classic. And it was this attention to detail and execution that felt sorely lacking in “Jacob’s Ladder” 2019. Sometimes, it’s best just to stick with the original.
#17: “The Wolfman” (2010)
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How does a studio remake a character as iconic as The Wolfman? If you said, “strip it of all emotional grit and replace it with sanitary CGI effects and stilted acting,” then you’re doing it wrong. Unfortunately, this was the approach taken with “The Wolfman” 2010, a film that was up against a pedigree of genre-defining special effects, and ultimately fell flat. There are things to like about the performance of Benicio del Toro, sure, but there are also tons of other great wolfman movies out there; movies with more believable werewolves. This one just couldn’t get the job done.
#16: “Total Recall” (2012)
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The original “Total Recall” was a unique film with “out-there” characters and even crazier effects. It also boasted some seriously impressive special effects for the time, such as Arnold Schwarzenegger’s insanely memorable head expansion out there on Mars. By comparison, it’s not out of the question for fans to forget that the 2012 “Total Recall” remake even happened, so disappointing were the final results. This remake shared little in common with the original’s tone or story, and served only as a boring and by-the-numbers sci-fi slog. Start the reactor: and send this one on a permanent vacation.
#15: “Oldboy” (2013)
Sometimes when filmmakers decide to remake a film, it leaves observers and filmgoers scratching their heads. This is one of those cases. It can be a daunting task, attempting to successfully adapt a film from another country into another’s language and culture. Perhaps too daunting in fact for director Spike Lee and his 2013 take on “Oldboy,” which largely fell upon a disinterested and skeptical audience upon release. Lee certainly knows how to make films, his own films, with a unique and very personal narrative voice. His “Oldboy,” however, is best left forgotten.
#14: “Red Dawn” (2012)
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It wasn’t the PG-13 rating that hampered this 2012 remake of “Red Dawn.” In fact, the original from 1984 was actually the first film ever to have this rating. Instead, this take on the John Milius-directed classic failed on its own merit: by just being a poor movie. The visceral stakes of the original feel lost in the 2012 iteration, and the film feels largely toothless and unexciting. The original “Red Dawn” pushed its brand new rating to the limit back in ‘84, and contained interesting thematic subtext about world politics, survival and the death of innocence. Meanwhile, not even Chris Hemsworth’s star could save “Red Dawn” 2012 from failing at the box office.
#13: “Clash of the Titans” (2010)
Are the CGI effects of the 2010 “Clash of the Titans” terrible? Well, no…not really. The 3-D conversion, however, was another matter. The film’s director, Louis Leterrier, even referred to it as “famously rushed and famously horrible,” which already puts this remake in some hot water. Add to this the fact that the original from 1981 was such a showcase for the special effects icon Ray Harryhausen, and it’s basically a recipe for disappointment. This didn’t stop a sequel, “Wrath of the Titans,” from being released in 2012, but we stick by our guns with this one: just don’t bother.
#12: “The Fog” (2005)
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John Carpenter is one of the most respected creative voices in the horror world. Yet, this hasn’t stopped many from attempting to remake the man’s films, with largely disappointing results. The 2005 iteration of “The Fog” is definitely one of those remakes, an effort that fails on its own merit, while also failing as a tribute to Carpenter. The remake doesn’t possess the star power of the original, and Carpenter’s signature style is absent and definitely missed. They call them “classics” for a reason, after all, and “The Fog” should’ve stayed in the eighties, where it belonged.
#11: “Arthur” (2011)
The role of the original “Arthur” was epitomized by the incomparable Dudley Moore. However, Russell Brand was still a hot commodity in 2011, so it was decided that a remake of the 1981 classic was going to be a thing. Did it work, you may ask? Well, it’s on this list, so of course it didn’t work. Audiences were already beginning to tire of Brand, and his comedic talents just couldn’t fill Moore’s shoes in the iconic role. The original film hinges upon Moore’s likability as an actor, as well as his ability to balance comedy with drama. Brand, however, just couldn’t get the job done.
#10: “The Day The Earth Stood Still” (2008)
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It isn’t exactly a bad idea to take a classic, yet older genre film and update it for the modern day. That said, “The Day the Earth Stood Still” could’ve worked as a film, and it did certainly make a profit. It’s also important, however, to balance out story and spectacle, yet the creative hands behind this film didn’t seem to get that memo. “The Day the Earth Stood Still” 2008 is big, loud and grandiose; a perfect IMAX seat-filler, for sure. But it could’ve been so much more, a nice bridge between sci-fi’s past and its present. Instead, this remake just feels empty inside, and watching it just felt like eating unsatisfying and unhealthy junk food.
#9: “Around The World in 80 Days” (2004)
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The stories of Jules Verne have been adapted for decades now, bringing to the screen high adventure and unbridled excitement. And then there’s 2004’s “Around the World in 80 Days,” which was…a movie. Yep…it certainly…was….a movie. Actually, it was a Razzie nominated movie, one that possessed very little in common with Verne’s original story. And it definitely couldn’t compare to prior film adaptations, such as the Academy Award-winning iteration from 1956. Now, we understand those were some pretty big shoes to fill, but “Around the World in 80 Days” didn’t even seem to try.
#8: Dinner For Schmucks (2010)
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“Dinner for Schmucks” could have benefitted from the fact that its source material, 1998’s “Le Diner de Cons,” possessed a comparatively lower commercial profile. Yet, the remake largely wastes its talented cast with a huge swing and a miss. Steve Carrell’s feels performance feels uncomfortably loud and exaggerated, although his pairing with Paul Rudd felt like it could’ve been onto something unique. The plot of an executive forced to find himself an idiot to take to a mean-spirited dinner is something of a tightrope, upon which “Dinner for Schmucks” unfortunately couldn’t balance. This one just falls flat.
#7: “The Invasion” (2007)
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At what point has an idea just been mined too many times? “The Invasion” serves as an interesting answer to that question, another reboot of “Invasion of the Body Snatchers,” and easily the worst to date. The crippling paranoia of the 70s version is missing, as is the classy, foreboding menace of the original. Not even the overall weirdness that was Abel Ferrara’s 1993 version is here. Instead, “The Invasion” just proved to be soulless and boring, which is a shame, because the source material just writes itself, doesn’t it?
#6: “Planet of the Apes” (2001)
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Although 2011’s “Rise of the Planet of the Apes” managed to save this classic franchise from extinction, this was still a long way off back in 2001. Here, it was Tim Burton’s turn to mess with our minds, and release a remake that just felt so weird. Mark Wahlberg is woefully miscast in the lead, as was model/athlete Estella Warren. Meanwhile, Tim Roth chewed scenery for all it was worth, there was a twist ending that left fans baffled, and yeah…it was a mess. Not even Paul Giamatti, or the undeniably excellent makeup could save this one.
#5: “Godzilla” (1998)
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The “Godzilla” franchise is another IP that’s thankfully earned a new lease on life, thanks to films like 2016’s “Shin Godzilla” and the Monsterverse. And it’s a good thing, too, because it almost all came crashing down back in 1998. That’s because the King of the Monsters was unfortunately put into the creative hands of disaster movie king Roland Emmerich. Emmerich basically turned The G Man into a “Jurassic Park” rip-off for the summer blockbuster season, complete with a lame tie-in tune from Puff Daddy and Jimmy Page. The ‘98 Godzilla was so bad, that the creature was actually canonized and renamed “Zilla” in Japan…y’know, just to avoid any confusion with the real McCoy.
#4: “The Wicker Man” (2006)
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On one hand, there’s no denying that director Neil LaBute’s 2006 reimagining of Robin Hardy’s classic, “The Wicker Man,” was some kind of what the eff fever dream. There’s also the lunacy of Nicolas Cage in the lead, complete with yelling, screaming and enough running in a bear suit to make you question your sanity. However, as a horror film it fails in tremendous fashion, severing the palpable atmosphere of the original, and relying on cheap jumps to frighten its audience. Take our advice: just watch the seventies original instead, and save this one for “bad movie night.”
#3 :”Rollerball” (2002)
It seems like a foregone conclusion that any film receiving the Hollywood remake treatment is going to have the lion’s share of its thematics muted for wide release. This remake of “Rollerball,” however, was another level of dumb. Norman Jewison’s original thrived upon its biting social commentary about class, money, power and social standing. It uses the actual sport of rollerball as a backdrop for these themes. “Rollerball” 2002, however, largely forgoes this approach, and instead takes the path of many other would-be blockbusters. This one is just full of action and noise, an ugly film where the brain is basically dead on arrival.
#2: “The Pink Panther” (2006)
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It appears, on paper at least, that the casting of Steve Martin as Inspector Jacques Clouseau for a new “Pink Panther” movie could’ve been inspired. This is despite Peter Sellers basically embodying the role for so many years. Unfortunately, both Martin and “The Pink Panther” 2006 prefer to grab for low-hanging fruit, instead of reaching for the stars. The humor here is disappointingly lowbrow, and unworthy of Sellers’ legacy, yet someone out there seemed to be watching “The Pink Panther,” because this cringe-fest actually managed to mine further depths with an even worse sequel in 2009.
#1: “Psycho” (1998)
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The decision for director Gus Van Sant to release a shot-for-shot remake of “Psycho” in 1998 was one that was met with some pretty strong reactions. The question of “why” came up again and again, and honestly? We’re still asking ourselves today about why “Psycho” ‘98 exists. It isn’t as if Anne Heche and especially Vince Vaughn weren’t game to try and step into the shoes of Janet Leigh and Anthony Perkins. It’s just that Van Sant tries so hard to replicate Alfred Hitchcock’s blocking and set-pieces that we’re constantly reminded of Hitch’s superior film. So why watch this one?
