20 Shocking Family Guy Moments
#20: Stewie Beats Up Brian
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“Patriot Games” We all know that Stewie has a bit of a violent streak, to say the least, but that’s usually reserved for weaponry and attempting to take over the world. We normally don’t see him use brute strength to get his way, but that changes when he becomes a bookie for Brian and it’s time for his canine companion to pay up. The longer it takes Brian to settle his debt, the more cruel Stewie’s attacks become towards him. We’re fairly surprised Brian managed to survive these beatings without lasting damage. Stewie does a lot of shocking things throughout the show, but this has to be one of his most brutal and surprising moments to date.
#19: Brian Goes After Lois
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“Play It Again, Brian” Throughout the series, we learn that some of Peter’s friends have the hots for his wife. Quagmire has a crush on her, and despite his, shall we say, direct tendencies, another character has been even more forward with her. We’re talking about Brian, and in this episode, he shoots his shot with her. During a trip to Martha’s Vineyard, Peter leaves Lois to hang out with Brian throughout most of the trip where, not unexpectedly, Brian’s feelings for her grow. What is unexpected is how forceful he is with her. Considering their relationship and the fact that he’s not normally like that, it’s safe to say we were quite put off by his behavior.
#18: Lois & Joyce’s Past
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“And I’m Joyce Kinney” After Diane Simmons’ downfall, Tom Tucker’s co-anchor is replaced by Joyce Kinney, whom Lois ends up befriending. While their friendship seems fun and innocent at first, we are stunned to learn of Joyce’s true intentions. We’re even more shocked to learn that Lois and Joyce knew each other in high school and that Lois pulled a brutal prank on Joyce, embarrassing her in front of the entire school. This is what motivates Joyce to learn as much about Lois as she can to use as ammo against her, and the entire dynamic between the two is completely unexpected.
#17: Stewie Gets Revenge on Olivia & Victor
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“Chick Cancer” Stewie’s mean streak isn’t limited to his own family members, as we see in this episode when he reunites with Olivia. He unwillingly falls in love with her and opts to be mean to her in an attempt to get her to return the feelings, taking a page right out of Mr. Quagmire’s playbook. The events that transpire are reminiscent of Woody Allen flicks, and it seems like Stewie has met his person. They get married as their relationship turns south, and Stewie catches Olivia in their playhouse with her friend, Victor. Stewie burns down the playhouse with his wife and her alleged lover still inside, and instead of feeling any regret, he has somewhat of a sexual awakening.
#16: Brian Lets a Family Drown
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“American Gigg-olo” Some of “Family Guy’s” darkest and most shocking moments occur during cutaways, and this scene involving Brian is one of the most grim. When Brian learns that he no longer has health coverage, he is understandably concerned considering he has a hernia. The origin of the hernia is the plot of this cutaway, in which we see Brian attempt to stop a woman’s car from sinking into water. He seems heroic at first, until the woman reveals she has a baby she needs to save, and Brian lets go, presumably letting them both drown. We know the joke is that he doesn’t want to be with a woman with a kid, but we did not see that bleak joke coming.
#15: Brian’s Protein Shake Venture
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“The Woof of Wall Street” Characters on the show can be known to do some pretty crazy things to get extra cash, and this instance is perhaps the most jaw-dropping so far. When Stewie gets savvy in the world of stocks, he helps Brian make some money to pay for car repairs, and Brian gets a taste for it. He wants to keep investing and finds a controversial company to sink money into. The company makes protein shakes from dogs, and you’d think that would discourage Brian from investing, right? Well, he doesn’t quite learn his lesson until he almost becomes a shake himself, and we couldn’t help but shake our heads at Brian’s lack of morals when it comes to making money.
#14: Oh, Shaving Cream!
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“Customer of the Week” Lois becomes unhinged in the later seasons of the show, and this might be the most desperate and crazy thing she’s done to date. Lois frequently visits the same coffee shop, getting to know the baristas and trying to be a well-liked patron. She tries to become customer of the week, but weeks pass with other coffee shop-goers winning the mediocre-at-best award. So, Lois decides to become a hero by saving one of the baristas during an allergic reaction which she stages, but that plan goes horribly awry. Even more terribly, Lois kidnaps alleged witnesses to keep what happened under wraps. When she gets out of jail, it’s clear she still hasn’t learned her lesson. Oh, shaving cream, indeed.
#13: Cecil Pritchfield
“Send in Stewie, Please” This episode involves a lot of shocking revelations about Stewart Gilligan Griffin. We learn that he’s lonely, obsessed with the Broadway musical “Hamilton,” and has been faking his English accent in an attempt to not be like everyone else. He reveals all of this in a moment of extreme vulnerability with therapist, Dr. Pritchfield, but he regrets revealing that much about himself. Dr. Pritchfield’s heart condition culminates in a heart attack during their session, and rather than helping him get his medication, Stewie lets his secrets die with Cecil. Stewie’s evil streak may have lessened as the seasons have gone on, but this episode shows he hasn’t changed deep down.
#12: Brian Sacrifices Himself
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“New Kidney in Town” We know that Peter and Brian share a special bond, and we learn just how close when Peter’s in need of a kidney transplant. Upon discovering that Brian is a match for Peter, he volunteers to be the donor. The major catch is that because Brian’s kidneys are small, he’ll have to donate both of them, which, as Brian points out, is all he has. He’s still willing to make the sacrifice, even with Stewie trying his darndest to convince Brian otherwise, in one of the more tender if not slightly gross moments shared between the two. Perhaps even more shocking is the ending to this episode, in which Dr. Hartman takes Brian’s place, saving both Brian and Peter.
#11: Injuring Stewie & Making Things Worse
“Brian Griffin’s House of Payne” When Stewie gets injured in this episode, we’re astounded at the lengths his family would go to to conceal his injury. During an argument between Chris and Meg, Stewie ends up gashing his head open after falling down the stairs. Peter helps them hide the injury from Lois instead of taking him to the hospital, even as he continues to get worse – dad of the year contender, for sure. Worst of all is when they want to turn the tables so Lois thinks she hurt Stewie, having her accidentally run over him, and she still also doesn’t want to take responsibility. We’re amazed Stewie survived this and that he didn’t exact some kind of revenge on his cruel family members.
#10: Drastic Measures on Mount Everest
“Into Fat Air” Lois tends to go a bit overboard when she feels she’s been slighted, and that’s how she ropes her family into climbing Mount Everest. They race to beat Ross, Pam, and Ben Fishman to the peak, and they think that they’ve conquered it before them until they discover that the Fishmans have already been there for hours. Their luck runs out there though, as the Griffins find Ben frozen on their way back down the mountain at the same time that they fear that they may starve to death. They take desperate measures to feed themselves, and although they come clean to Ross and Pam about their son, we’re pretty much in shock throughout this whole sequence of events.
#9: Time Travel to the Beginning
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“Back to the Pilot” There are plenty of surprising turns of events in this episode, as Brian and Stewie travel back to the pilot ten years after the episode’s original airing. We’re surprised to see the contrast between what the characters’ originally looked like and how far their animations have come, as well as the difference in both Stewie and Brian’s personalities and dispositions. We also see that some of Peter’s friends in the pilot never reappear and that Meg’s voice changes drastically, almost like she’s an entirely different person. Out of all of Stewie and Brian’s time-traveling adventures, this one had the most striking twists and turns, and it’s full of some of the most memorable moments on the show.
#8: Stewie & Lois Battle
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“Stewie Kills Lois” & “Lois Kills Stewie” Stewie was originally always plotting to kill his mother, but we’re pretty sure that he’s bluffing since he never seemed to go through with it. That is, until early in Season 6 when he finds his parents on their cruise and he shoots Lois, causing her to fall overboard. Peter nearly goes to jail for the crime until she turns up alive and exposes Stewie. He rises to become president of the world afterward, continuing his evil streak, until Lois decides to put a stop to it. The mother and son duo battle, but Lois finds herself unable to kill Stewie – Peter, however, doesn’t have a problem. Thankfully, it’s all a simulation, and these shocking events didn’t even actually happen.
#7: Quagmire & The Simpsons
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“Movin’ Out (Brian’s Song)” Quagmire has done his fair share of surprising and disturbing things throughout the years, but this one has to take the cake. In a promotion for “The Simpsons” at the bottom of the screen, we see Marge get attacked by Quagmire. They run off-screen, and when they return Marge and Quagmire decide to go back to the Simpson house for another go at it. While we don’t see it, we hear Quagmire kill Homer after he catches them before killing the rest of the family. It’s a gag that takes the rivalry between the adult animated sitcoms to the next level, to the point where Fox even refused to air it – that’s about as shocking as it gets.
#6: Brian at the Bank
“Brian & Stewie” One of the most polarizing and memorable episodes of the series is the one in which Brian and Stewie are locked in a bank vault. Between Stewie drunkenly getting his ear pierced and Brian having to clean out Stewie’s diaper, there were plenty of moments that left us speechless. But, the most shocking of all is when Stewie asks Brian why he keeps a gun in his safe deposit box, and Brian tells him that it’s in case he chooses to end his life. It’s one of the most mature and unexpected conversations between the two, solidifying them as best friends. Although we didn’t see that particular discussion coming, we’re happy Brian has Stewie in his life.
#5: Meg Speaks Up
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“Seahorse Seashell Party” Meg is always the punching bag of the Griffin family, and in this episode, she finally takes matters into her own hands. When the family is storm-stayed at home, they pick on Meg like they always do until she ends up airing out some long-held resentments, and she does not hold back. She viciously attacks her mother’s parenting and criminal past, Chris’ treatment of her, and her father’s recklessness. As jarring as this debacle is, perhaps the most surprising part of all of this is that Meg feels regret for calling out her family, and retreats. Realizing she’d rather be a scapegoat for their flawed personalities, she allows them to continue being themselves, and things go back to normal.
#4: Brenda & Jeff
“Screams of Silence: The Story of Brenda Q” Quagmire has a seriously complex family dynamic, with complicated relationships with both of his parents. But, it’s his sister whose situation is the most unexpectedly dark. After Quagmire ends up in the hospital, his sister Brenda comes to visit him in the hospital. Much to the dismay of Quagmire and his friends, Brenda also brings along her boyfriend, who is openly abusive towards her. Their relationship is hard to watch, with Brenda sustaining visible injuries and constantly being yelled at by Jeff, yet she stays with him after learning that she’s pregnant. Quagmire and his friends decide to take care of Jeff to help Brenda, and the entire episode is pretty unsettling.
#3: Diane Simmons
“And Then There Were Fewer” This whodunnit-style episode is filled with surprising deaths, but possibly the most shocking part is who is committing the murders, and why. After everyone at James Woods’ mansion comes to the conclusion that Tom Tucker must be the murderer, all of the beloved characters prepare to leave. As they do, Lois talks to Diane and realizes that she is the real killer, and her goal was to kill James Woods and frame Tom Tucker. She was definitely not a prime suspect throughout this two-parter, and the fact that she almost kills Lois to keep her silence is jolting. We’re just grateful Stewie was there to save the day in the end.
#2: Christmas Time is Killing Us
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“Road to the North Pole” Even though Stewie is a genius well beyond his years, he still has some attributes that are exclusive to children. One of those is a belief in Santa, and in this episode, Stewie makes it his mission to go to the North Pole and kill him. Brian becomes Stewie’s reluctant travel companion and when they get to the North Pole, not only are they stunned to actually meet Old St. Nick, but they find him on the brink of death. Because everyone has become too greedy in demanding presents from Santa, he, his elves, and his reindeer have taken a turn for the worst. We didn’t expect “Family Guy” to take a shot at Santa Claus, but here we are.
#1: Brian’s Fate
“Life of Brian” Most of the episodes on the show involve scenarios that eventually get solved or, at the very least, don’t last more than one episode. In “Life of Brian,” not only does one of the main characters die unexpectedly, it looks like he’s gone for good. The Griffins move on and get another dog, and with Stewie’s time machine out of commission, the death of Brian is cemented as the most shocking moment on the show. Even as Vinny grew on us as the new family dog, we couldn’t be happier to see Stewie reunited with his best friend, eventually giving this darkly surprising moment a happy ending.
