Top 10 Signs A Horror Movie Will Suck
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Top 10 Signs That a Horror Movie is Gonna Suck
Another Top 10 Horror Movie Villain Weaknesses
Yeah, we’ll be skipping that one. Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for the top ten signs that a horror movie is going to suck. For this list, we’ll be looking at various tells and characteristics that strongly suggest that a horror film is going to be subpar.
#10: It’s a Remake of a Classic
Top 10 Signs That A Movie Is Going To Suck
The classics are classics for a reason, and you should never, ever touch them. Yeah, its production value might leave something to be desired in the modern age, but we like to think that most people will look past that. There are notable exceptions to the “remake rule”, like Zack Snyder’s “Dawn of the Dead” or Alexandre Aja’s “The Hills Have Eyes”, but for the most part, remakes are real stinkers. “The Omen,” “The Wicker Man,” “The Amityville Horror,” “Black Christmas,” “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre,” and to some extent, Rob Zombie’s “Halloween” movies… they all disappoint. For all their modern effects, they feel like soulless cash grabs meant to coast on brand recognition alone. Don’t even get us started on the more recent Freddy and Jason outings.
#9: Bad Acting
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Of course, bad acting will ruin ANY movie. But scary movies in particular require quality performances in order to sell the horror. If the actors are bad, we aren’t convinced that they’re in any danger, and the movie loses all sense of tension and immersion. Remember “The Blair Witch Project?” The acting was so convincing that audiences actually thought the footage was real. Or how about “The Shining?” Jack Nicholson made you believe that he was actually going crazy, and it was deeply unnerving! But when you have some poor child actor, damsel in distress or frat boy #6 that can’t sell their situation, it can completely ruin what could have otherwise been a decent horror flick.
#8: It’s Based on a Video Game
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If a horror movie is based on a video game, better stay far, far away. Then again, then the same could be said about all video game adaptations. Most of them are little more than an exercise in disappointment - we said most, not all! Yes, there are a few exceptions like the first “Resident Evil,” but there have been far more misses than hits. Your mileage may vary with some of the bigger titles like “Doom” and “Silent Hill,” but both of those movies were critically eviscerated upon release. However, things really fall apart once you start getting into Uwe Boll territory; “BloodRayne,” “House of the Dead,” and “Alone in the Dark” were all critically panned, with the latter being considered among the worst films ever made.
#7: Bad CGI
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Much like bad acting, bad CGI can instantly take you out of a movie. Worse, it can make you laugh. When it comes to horror, there’s simply no beating good old-fashioned practical effects; just look at “The Thing”! But whether it’s due to time and/or budget constraints or simple laziness, a lot of modern horror movies take CGI shortcuts. The 2011 remake of “The Thing” is a perfect example of how CGI can utterly ruin a horror film. Bad CGI similarly made the infected look goofy in “I Am Legend.” Though “It Chapter Two” was by no means a terrible film, dodgy CGI definitely resulted in a lot of disappointment. CGI is a great tool, but use it sparingly and make sure it’s top-notch.
#6: An Overindulgence in Horror Tropes
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You can usually tell from the trailer just how tropey a horror movie is going to be. Some trailers entice you with their mood. For example, “The Lighthouse” has a fantastic trailer that doesn’t give much away. But then you see something like “The Nun” or “Truth or Dare”, you already get the feeling that it’s going to suck. Jump scares galore, stupid character choices, some spooky legend, screaming faces, creepy things standing in the background and predictable fake-out scares. You’ve seen them all a thousand times before, and after the 976th time, they sort of just stop being scary, ya know? Of course, you can’t always judge a book by its cover, or in this case, a movie by its trailer, but… sometimes, you can.
#5: Poorly Designed Monsters & Villains
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This is another thing you can typically judge by the trailers and posters. A lot of cheap horror movies don’t really put a ton of effort into their villains. Yellow contacts and some blood don’t exactly make for a classic villain. Some monsters are lazy and cliché, like “The Bye Bye Man’s” cloaked figure, and some are unintentionally hilarious, like the ‘smiling’ people of “Truth or Dare” or the Slender Man. If there’s one thing “The Blair Witch Project” and 2016’s “Blair Witch” taught us, it’s that less is often more when it comes to the supernatural.
#4: A January Release
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It’s no secret that January is a dumping ground for movies. And if a horror flick is released in January, it’s often a hint that it’s going to be a special kind of awful. There have been a good number of truly dreadful horror movies released in the last few Januarys. “Paranormal Activity: The Marked Ones” and “Devil’s Due” in 2014. “The Woman in Black” sequel in 2015. “The Forest” and “The Boy” in 2016. “The Bye Bye Man” in 2017. “Insidious: The Last Key” in 2018. 2019 had “Escape Room,” which certainly wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t great, either. Chances are that if it’s a January release, it’s going to be some lower budget, jump scare-riddled mess without much originality.
#3: A High Numbered Sequel
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Here’s a golden rule – if a horror series goes beyond two entries, chances are that those numbered sequels will be lame. The first couple “Saw” movies were pretty good, but somewhere along the way to EIGHT instalments it became mindless torture porn. While a 9th film scheduled for 2020, the franchise’s track record doesn’t necessarily give us high hopes. There are seemingly countless “Halloween,” “Friday the 13th,” and “A Nightmare on Elm Street” movies, each one usually more ridiculous than the last. “The Texas Chain Saw Massacre,” “The Exorcist,” and “Jaws” all saw unnecessary and terrible sequels. “The Conjuring” was a great film, but now we have an entire Conjuring universe, because apparently we can’t tell a simple ghost story without it becoming a whole cinematic event.
#2: An Over-Reliance on Jump Scares
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We don’t mind a well-placed and well-timed jump scare or two. But it’s a significant problem when the movie’s only tactic is to bombard you with sudden screams and loud screeches. Luckily, you can usually tell from the trailer if a movie will rely too heavily on jump scares. They’ll include about three or four in the trailer alone, and all are as predictable as you could possibly imagine. When you’re tired of the jump scares in the TRAILER, just imagine how bored you’ll feel during the movie itself. There’s a reason why the term “jump scare” has become a bad word in horror circles.
#1: A PG-13 Rating
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We’re not saying that ALL PG-13 horror movies are bad. In fact, there have been more than a few quality ones over the years. But there’s no denying that a large majority of them are trading scare factor for bigger box office potential. An R rating often allows for a more immersive and scarier atmosphere. Characters swear as they naturally would, blood pours out of wounds as they naturally would, and the movie can show more disturbing content -which affects us on a more primal and emotional level. PG-13 horror movies often come across as sanitized products meant to appeal to teenagers and as wide an audience as possible, which generally means safe and inoffensive material. Many of those qualities are likely to lead to a bad horror movie.
