Top 10 Characters Who Are Definitely Slytherins
#10: Don Draper “Mad Men” (2007-15)
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A consummate 1960s businessman, Don Draper is an advertising executive. Don is also exceptionally cunning and insightful into the mind of consumers, which makes him great at his job. However, while he can frequently be ruthless when his job calls for it, Don is still frequently tormented by inner demons, both from his past, and from his relationships with women and his alcoholism. He can also be a compassionate man, at least more so than many of his contemporaries. So, while Don may be more open-minded than many of the pure-blood fanatics who make up Slytherin, he’d still fit right in.
#9: Tinker Bell “Peter Pan” (1953)
Tinker Bell is the friend of the eponymous eternal boy, but she’s not exactly as sweet as she first appears. While this pixie with a pixie cut is feisty and quick-tempered like a Gryffindor, her deceitfulness and underhanded tactics put her firmly in Slytherin for us. Plus, she’s already dressed in green! Frequently jealous and spiteful, Tink is willing to do anything to get what she wants, with her primary goal often being having Pan all to herself. To that end, she’s willing to resort to attempted murder and even betraying Pan after feeling abandoned by him.
#8: Scarlett O’Hara “Gone with the Wind” (1939)
Scarlett O’Hara may begin her story as a spoiled Southern belle, but by its end she’s developed into a dogged and ambitious woman who does whatever she needs to in order to provide for herself and her family. In short, just the sort of woman who would do well in Slytherin. Now if only she weren’t so hung up on her Hufflepuff of a brother-in-law, when she had a perfectly good Slytherin beau in Rhett! Frankly, we hope the Sorting Hat gives a damn enough to realize where she belongs.
#7: Woody “Toy Story” franchise (1995-)
This one might seem odd at first glance, but it’s obvious when you think about it. Heroes can be Slytherins too you know! Woody is an ambitious toy, who relishes his position as Andy’s favorite plaything for many years; reacting strongly when this position is threatened. Similarly, whenever he is separated from the boy, Woody is able to repeatedly find his way back to him despite incredible odds, demonstrating tremendous resourcefulness and a willingness to do anything to accomplish his goal. And, conveniently for him, Woody is already intimately familiar with the Slytherin mascot. “There’s a snake in my boot!”
#6: Sue Sylvester “Glee” (2009-15)
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As tempting as it was to choose Santana Lopez instead, we couldn’t choose anyone from “Glee” but Sue Sylvester. The coach of the cheerleading squad, Sue is a bully to both students and faculty alike, and often acts as the show’s antagonist. Relentless in her pursuit of her goals, which usually involve either acquiring more authority and/or disbanding the glee club, Sue can be altruistic to others, but it’s usually inadvertent or else to aid those already close to her. Despite her caustic tongue, Sue still manages to accomplish most of what she puts her mind to, and Slytherin could do worse than the future Vice President of the United States.
#5: Lady Mary Crawley “Downton Abbey” (2010-15)
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The obvious pick from “Downton Abbey” would be Thomas Barrow, that sly sneak. However, we’re singling out a subtler Slytherin selection. Lady Mary Crawley comes across as cold, and she certainly can be to those she doesn’t know or doesn’t like. She’s also quite self-centered, going out of her way to be the center of attention and being particularly vindictive towards her younger sister, Edith. However, Mary does have a good heart when it counts, as she’s kind to her servants and quite open-minded and progressive; all qualities that Slytherin could use more of.
#4: Schmidt “New Girl” (2011-18)
One of the roommates who makes up the main cast of this sitcom, Schmidt, whose first name remains a mystery for much of the series, is a handsome and cocky guy who’s far more successful than his friends are. This leads him to be rather insensitive and, according to his friends, a douchebag. Despite his controlling nature, Schmidt does have some admirable qualities, such as his persistence, particularly in his love for Cece. Slytherins can be self-interested, but they usually have people they care for and Schmidt is one such man.
#3: Tom Haverford “Parks and Recreation” (2009-15)
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You know how we just said that Slytherins have people they care for? Well, Tom Haverford does too… but… he cares more about himself. And snazzy clothes. Superficial, sarcastic, and utterly self-obsessed, Tom may be Leslie Knope’s right-hand man at the Pawnee Parks Department, but he’s frequently unreliable, as his goals usually involve picking up women or finding other ways to benefit himself. As terrible as he is at most of what he does, Tom at least aims high and displays creativity and flair in his schemes, which is all Slytherin can ask for.
#2: Aladdin “Aladdin” (1992)
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The eponymous character of this Disney film may be the protagonist, but he’s a Slytherin through and through! Aladdin is a street rat, who steals to survive, which is in keeping with Slytherins’ tendencies to disregard the rules, but he has big dreams and ambitions as well. He’s clever enough to outfox soldiers and the clever villain Jafar. Aladdin is also a consummate liar, who will do and say anything to be with Jasmine. Sure, this does get him into trouble, but despite his missteps, she still falls for him in the end. He just needs to work on his relationship with snakes. Before we get to our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions: Cory Baxter “That’s So Raven” (2003-07) Nick Wilde “Zootopia” (2016) Jeff Winger “Community” (2009-15) Karen Walker “Will & Grace” (1998-2006; 2017-) Maggie Simpson “The Simpsons” (1989-)
#1: Petyr ‘Littlefinger’ Baelish “Game of Thrones” (2011-19)
Although the dog-eat-dog land of Westeros is filled to the brim with social climbers, one character has them all beat – Petyr Baelish, a.k.a. Littlefinger. Born into a minor noble house, Littlefinger manages to acquire both money and important positions by hook, crook, murder, scheming, and just about every crime in the book. A master manipulator who sets in motion many events in the series, which results in untold deaths, Littlefinger wants power and no one and nothing stays his hand in his pursuit of it. The Sorting Hat would probably shout “Slytherin” just by being in the same room with him!
