Top 20 Greatest Seinfeld Quotes of All Time

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Top 20 Greatest Seinfeld Quotes of All Time

VOICE OVER: Rebecca Brayton WRITTEN BY: Garrett Alden
Welcome to WatchMojo and today we'll be counting down our picks for the top 20 Seinfeld quotes. For this list, we'll be going over the most popular catchphrases, sayings, and concepts popularized by the legendary sitcom. Our countdown includes "Serenity Now," "But I Don't Want to be a Pirate," "A Festivus for the Rest of Us," and more!
Transcript

#20: “That’s Gold, Jerry – GOLD!”

“The Fatigues”

Kenny Bania is a so-so comedian who always seems to ride Jerry’s coattails. In one episode, the mediocre funnyman loses his girlfriend after a poor performance. This leads to Jerry mentoring Bania to help improve his material. The two end up brainstorming a way to make Ovaltine. Ultimately, Jerry comes up with a silly joke about the milky drink mix that has Bania saying, “That gold Jerry – GOLD!” It’s a phrase that’s definitely become synonymous with Bania. And if you want to express appreciation for something and reference the show in the same breath, try this golden phrase.

#19: “You Gotta’ See the Baby!”

“The Boyfriend” & “The Hamptons”

The gang has few recurring friends who appear throughout the show. But none are as audibly distinct as Carol, a nasally voiced woman who used to live in the building. She and her husband Michael frequently invite them to visit them to see their children. Or, as Jerry and Elaine put it, “You gotta’ see the baby!” Ironically, Carol herself never says the exact line. She only comes very close to it a few times. When Jerry and friends do oblige and see the baby, it always makes for a memorable and usually disastrous scene. Maybe it would’ve been best for Carol to keep her children out of Seinfeld’s sight.

#18: “Significant Shrinkage”

“The Hamptons”

During a trip to the Hamptons, George gets undressed after spending some time swimming. Unfortunately, a woman named Rachel walks in on him as he’s getting changed. George is majorly embarrassed because the cold water made a certain body part appear smaller than normal. While talking to Jerry about it, George uses a memorable phrase to reference the phenomenon.…”You mean – shrinkage.” “Yes! Significant shrinkage!”He and Jerry’s talk with Elaine about shrinkage is also iconic. This quote helped popularize the term and spread awareness of what can happen to men right after a dip into the water.

#17: “I Can’t Spare a Square”

“The Stall”

Elaine is in the bathroom at a movie and finds herself unknowingly sitting in a stall next to Jerry’s then girlfriend Jane. Elaine quickly realizes that she’s completely out of toilet paper. When she asks for help from her neighbor, Jane refuses with a hilarious response. “I can’t spare a square.” While Elaine’s left desperate in everyone’s worst nightmare scenario, we’re still laughing at the situation. It gets even better when Jane gives us her perspective on why she couldn’t loan the toilet paper in the first place. Elaine ultimately manages to get her revenge by recreating the situation at the coffee shop with the roles reversed.

#16: “They’re Real, & They’re Spectacular”

“The Implant” & ”The Finale”

When Elaine claims that Jerry’s girlfriend Sidra has a couple of fake assets, he becomes convinced she’s right. However, an accidental fall by Elaine in the sauna has her retracting her previous belief. But everything goes south when Elaine and Jerry’s friendship is exposed. Sidra becomes convinced that the sauna incident was meant to determine if she was all authentic. She breaks it off with Jerry in dramatic fashion and returns to tell him: “By the way, they’re real, and they’re spectacular!” The sentiment is echoed during the gang’s trial by Jackie Chiles in the show’s finale. We have to love Sidra’s confidence.

#15: “Did You Just Double-Dip That Chip?”

“The Implant”

While Elaine and Jerry are having their escapade with Sidra, George is off having an iconic moment of his own. He attended the wake of his girlfriend Betsy’s aunt in the hopes of accelerating their relationship. Unfortunately, George makes a party faux pas that is noticed and called out. “Did you just double-dip that chip?” We can’t defend him because we clearly saw him dip a chip, take a bite, and dip it again. While this term may have existed before “Seinfeld,” George's ill-timed party foul made it a recognizable phrase today. We just don’t recommend getting into a physical fight after using this double dipping quote.

#14: “George Is Getting Upset!”

Various

The guys encounter a guy named Jimmy at the gym who refers to himself in the third person. After spending time with him, George starts to pick up this habit in small ways. Moments of stress particularly bring it out. We all remember how he used it to react to Kung Pow chicken in a sweaty moment. “George likes his chicken spicy!” However, we wanted to put the spotlight on a more universal quote. During this storyline and future episodes, George will remark “George is getting upset!”. He uses the quote in moments where he feels anxious or angry. It’s both practically his catchphrase and a fun thing to say whenever things don’t go your way.

#13: “Maybe the Dingo Ate Your Baby”

“The Stranded”

In “The Stranded” episode, Elaine and Jerry get left behind at a party that George brought them to. A particularly miserable Elaine gets sick of one of the partygoers going on and on about her fiancée. The obnoxious woman eventually refers to her significant other as her “baby”. When she says that she lost the poor baby, Elaine replies: “Maybe the dingo ate your baby.” This is in reference to an unfortunate real-life tragedy in Australia. However, it’s likely that many Americans won’t even realize that this quote was the result of actual events. They’ll just recall the phrase as one of Elaine’s most memorable quotes.

#12: “Hello…Newman!”

Various

Newman’s a postal worker that’s a good friend and neighbor…to some people. But Jerry has very different feelings about him. The two of them have a mutual hatred that’s one of the most entertaining rivalries in any sitcom. Whenever they meet each other, Jerry will always deliver his hello in the same venomous way. It’s a habit that extends even to Jerry’s mother. It’s the ultimate way to greet your nemesis if you have one. Actor Wayne Knight has reportedly been getting this said to him in real life for decades now. And honestly, it’s hard to blame the fans for wanting to say this fun phrase.

#11: “Well, the Jerk Store Called, They’re Running Out of You!”

“The Comeback”

George is the avatar of pettiness. One of his most vindictive moments happens when his coworker Reily zings him for eating too much shrimp. On the way home, he comes up with a “perfect” comeback that he has to share with the group. (“Well, the jerk store called, and they’re running out of you!”) Unfortunately, the rest of the gang doesn’t find his retort to be all that impressive. But not only does George stick to his guns, but he also flies to another state just to use the line after Reilly transfers to another job. We’ve all come up with a lame comeback like “jerk store”. But George’s dedication to making sure it was heard elevated this witty phrase in our books.

#10: “And You Want to Be My Latex Salesman.”

“The Boyfriend”

When George is cornered by his unemployment officer, he invents a position. He claims he was attempting to get a job at a made-up latex company that happens to have Jerry’s phone number. Like many of the lines on this list, it’s the circumstances surrounding this line that make it all the more legendary. When Kramer answers the phone and unintentionally destroys his friend’s ruse, George tries to stop him while his pants are firmly around his ankles. His futile run sets a great laugh-out-loud line courtesy from Jerry.

#9: “But Are You Still Master of Your Domain?”

“The Contest”

This phrase stood at the core of one of the most groundbreaking episodes of any sitcom. This perfectly crafted line ensured the foursome never had to say a word about a certain adult activity. All the while, the entire episode is completely focused on the concept. This brilliant worldplay helped net Larry David his only solo Emmy on the show for writing. The particular episode was also once chosen by TV Guide as the greatest TV episode of all time. We don’t think any of that well deserved praise would have been possible had this line not become a virtual catchphrase.

#8: “These Pretzels Are Making Me Thirsty.”

“The Alternate Side”

When Kramer’s unique charisma manages to gain the attention of a famed director, he’s given a line in one of his movies. And you can bet this quirky New Yorker is going to get everything he can out of it. The line is made all the more memorable by the fact that Kramer repeats it multiple times. He also tries to get the entire crew to chime in as well. The especially overwrought version of the phrase uttered by George will also stay with us. Thanks to multiple ways of saying this quote, we’ll always utter it whenever we’re eating something salty.

#7: “A Festivus for the Rest of Us.”

“The Strike”

When Frank Costanza realized he was raining blows down upon another man over a doll he was trying to buy his son for Christmas, he realized there had to be another way. The result is a new holiday and a classic Seinfeld line to boot. Perhaps it’s the catchy, rhyming nature of it all. Or maybe the late great Jerry Stiller’s outstanding delivery is what won us over. Whatever the x factor is here, we know that hearing this quote always brings a smile to our faces. Let the airing of grievances begin!

#6: “But I Don’t Want to Be a Pirate.”

“The Puffy Shirt”

We’ve all been in the situation where we just can’t make out what someone is saying but we don’t want to ask them to repeat it yet again. Normally, there’s no harm to playing along despite having no idea what is happening. However, when Jerry finds himself in this situation, he ends up having to wear an ugly puffy shirt on “The Today Show” His whiny and almost infantile response says it all. Despite empathizing with his situation, we can’t stop laughing at his desperation to escape his fate. It’s a shame it was too late for Jerry to jump ship and avoid the shirt completely.

#5: “Do You Think You’re Sponge-Worthy?”

“The Sponge”

After Elaine’s preferred form of birth control is discontinued, she manages to acquire a case of contraceptive sponges. So, she decides to use them judiciously. This scenario created another golden opportunity for Seinfeld writers to avoid the censors coming down on them. During the episode, Elaine’s potential lover is grilled about what makes him worthy to spend a night or two with Elaine. She opens up the discussion with one iconic question. This incredibly memorable quote was a great way to give Elaine agency without stirring up controversy. And to top it all off, it was incredibly funny.

#4: “Yada, Yada, Yadda”

“The Yada Yada”

George’s latest girlfriend has a tendency to leave out the juiciest parts of any story. She instead opts to replace the best details with this infuriating substitute phrase. Before long, George is borrowing the phrase to skip out on things he doesn’t want to talk about either. Believe it or not, this phrase could’ve been around as early as the 1940s. However, it just seems perfectly suited for this “Seinfeld” Episode. Named by the Paley Center as the funniest TV phrase of all time, we thought about including it and then yada, yada, yada here it is.

#3: “Serenity Now!”

“The Serenity Now”

Another creation associated with George’s outrageous father Frank, “serenity now” was supposed to serve as a calming influence for the eccentric man and his escalating blood pressure. But when he chooses to scream it at the top of his lungs, it’s upsetting for his wife and hilarious for the audience. The phrase eventually spread outside the Costanza family to Cosmo Kramer. While the eccentric neighbor used it to keep calm at first, it wasn’t long before he started yelling it too. Given how wrong things seem to go for anyone who uses this phase, we wouldn’t recommend saying it to de-stress.

#2: “…Not That There’s Anything Wrong With That.”

“The Outing”

During “The Outing” episode, the writers wanted to take aim at people who struggled to accept LGBT+ people in society. The story revolves around rumors that Jerry and George are a little bit more than friends. Everytime they want to dismiss the claims while not wanting to come off as prejudiced they utter one phrase. Their approach to an LGBT+ plot at the time won the episode a a GLAAD Media Award. And it also helped create a phrase that the show will be tied to until the end of time.

#1: “No Soup for You!”

“The Soup Nazi”

Of all the guest stars on “Seinfeld,” there are perhaps none more well-known than the Soup Nazi. He’s the head of a restaurant specializing in soup who has militant views of what is acceptable of his customers. This strict and mustachioed chef won’t hesitate to take away your precious bisque or Mulligatawny if you so much as order the wrong way with one phrase. His acclaimed quote became a massive hit. The character would later appear in several commercial appearances and the chef’s actor, Larry Thomas, a cameo on “Scrubs”. Who knew a phrase about soup could become so important in pop culture?
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