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Top 10 Most Insane Steam Achievements

VO: Riccardo Tucci WRITTEN BY: Scott Stratton
The likelihood of you unlocking these hard as nails achievements is very low! For this list we'll be looking at the most insane achievements on Steam, so expect games such as Garry's Mod, Half Life 2: Episode 2, Dead Rising and Super Meat Boy. Have you actually unlocked any of these achievements? Let us know in the comments! Have an idea you want to see made into a WatchMojo video? Check out our suggest page at http://WatchMojo.comsuggest and submit your idea.

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Top 10 Most Insane Steam Achievements

Many keyboards have perished in pursuit of these achievements. Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’ll be counting down our picks for the Top 10 Most Insane Steam Achievements.

For this list, we’ll be looking at achievements on the Steam platform that are notoriously difficult to obtain, or are cryptic in nature.

#10: Master of the Universe

“VVVVVV” (2010)

Starting off with a particularly devilish achievement, this one asks you to simply beat the game without dying. Now, anyone who’s played this game can tell you that this is much harder than you think it is. The game itself is a pretty straight-forward platformer but instead of jumping, the player has to shift gravity in order to make their way through the various rooms filled with spikes, disappearing platforms, and enemies. It’s the kind of game where trial-and-error reigns supreme, making this achievement one that you can really only complete after hours of learning and practicing each room. So if you got the patience for that then we wish you luck!

#9: Go Outside

“The Stanley Parable” (2011)

This game has a pretty weird set of achievements, and this is just one of them. It’s not cryptic or difficult by any means as it just requires that you don’t play the game for a few years. Yep, you heard correctly; you cannot play the game for 5 whole years. Now the game itself doesn’t take long to beat, and it doesn’t seem to be the kind of game that would keep you playing every single day. However, if you’re the the completionist-type then this one is going to be driving you crazy for a long time… unless you cheat by changing your system clock.

#8: Unachievable

(Also from) “The Stanley Parable” (2011)

“It is impossible to get this achievement.” Yep, that’s the only hint you get for this one. However, on the contrary, there are actually a few ways to get this achievement. The first is to basically cheat by using some console commands to forcibly make it pop. The other way is to just play the game and hope that you get it. The reason being that the developer made it so that the achievement would randomly be awarded to players as they play. They even admitted in an interview that they would change the how it was awarded every patch after someone had figured it out. Now that’s one way of keeping people interested in your game.

#7: Impossible Boy

“Super Meat Boy” (2010)

“Super Meat Boy” is one of those games that has a seat at the “incredibly hard platformers” table. It’s tight controls and quick reload times allow the developer to throw some truly terrifying level designs at you, and that’s made very clear for this achievement. You have to complete the Cotton Alley Dark World without dying. Dark Worlds act as harder versions of the levels you would normally complete on a regular playthrough. Cotton Alley’s Dark World is notoriously hard to get through already but by throwing in the classic “no death” modifier in there it becomes a true test of skill and endurance that only the most dedicated meat boys and girls will be able to complete.

#6: Tau Efficiency

“Warhammer 40k: Dawn of War 2 - Retribution” (2011)

In the grim, dark future of the 41st millennium, this achievement is still a pain in the ass to get. “Dawn of War 2” allows three players to play cooperatively in "The Last Stand”, a “horde” mode with the difficulty increasing as you fight through waves of enemies. For this achievement, you must kill three doppelgängers within five seconds of each other. It doesn’t sound too bad until you realize that these enemies only appear on the 16th wave, and are incredibly dangerous. Not only that but you, as the Tau Commander character, must get the kills. This means that you absolutely cannot let you teammates land the killing blow on ANY of these guys or else you’ll have to start all over again.

#5: 7 Day Survivor

“Dead Rising” (2011)

A classic game for any zombie fan, “Dead Rising” has player take control of Frank West as he struggles to survive the never-ending hordes of undead inside a large mall. The main campaign is limited by a time, but you can eventually unlock “Infinite Mode” which challenges you to survive as long as possible. In lieu of a timer, Frank has a food meter that must be maintained, and there’s only a limited amount of food available. To get this achievement you just have to survive 7 in-game days in this mode. That’s only… 14 hours in real world time. Also you can’t save. Have fun!

#4: Little Rocket Man

“Half Life 2: Episode 2” (2007)

There is nothing worse in a video game than having to protect someone. Having to split your focus on your enemies and the less-than-useful NPC is the reason why escort missions are met with sighs of gamers everywhere. “Episode 2” has this in a form of an achievement where the goal is to carry a garden gnome that you find near start of the game to a space rocket near the end. Now the good thing is that the gnome is an object so you don’t have to worry about it moving too slow, or dying by running in the wrong direction. You do, however, have to worry about the gnome accidentally launching you out of the map.

#3: The Three Mountains

“Europa Universalia IV” (2013)

“Europa Universalia” is one of those massive “4x” strategy games, similar to the Civilization series, where you’re asked to: explore, expand, exploit, and exterminate your way to victory. Naturally, you would want to start out as a nation with some significant power so that you can plan your conquest without much worry. Well, throw that comfort out the window for this achievement because you’ll be playing as the small island nation of Ryuku which is just south of Japan. You start off with a small force of six regiments which is not nearly enough to go toe-to-toe with either Japan or Korea. You’ll have to be incredibly strategic in your path to world conquest, and it won’t be easy!

#2: Yes, I Am The Real Garry!

"Garry’s Mod” (2006)

Achievement hunting can get pretty frustrating when it comes to multiplayer games. “Garry’s Mod” takes this frustration a bit further with this achievement which you can only unlock by being on the same server as Garry Newman, the creator of the game. The big joke is that he doesn’t play all the often, if at all anymore, making this nigh impossible to get especially nowadays. Though there are players who do have it, and thanks to a group called 100Pals. In 2018, they managed to convince Garry to host a server event with them so that a ton of people could finally put this achievement to rest. What a nice guy!

#1: 90 Day Streak

“World of Guns: Guns Disassembly” (2014)

You wouldn’t really expect a simulation-puzzle game to have particularly difficult achievements, and yet here’s “World of Guns” taking the bronze medal. This cross-genre title has you learning about the inner workings of guns through assembly and disassembly. Every weapon is a puzzle in its own right challenging you as you carefully take them apart piece-by-piece. There are daily puzzles to complete and that’s where this achievement comes in. To get it, all you have to do is complete 90 daily puzzles in a row, which is more time consuming than difficult, but just make sure to keep on top of it. You wouldn’t want to reset at day 89!

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