Top 20 Funniest Horrible Histories Sketches

#20: HHTV News: Storming the Bastille

Many believe the French Revolution was the most important event in human history. It got truly heated with the storming of the Bastille in 1789, when revolutionaries captured the Parisian prison for themselves. HHTV News sends Mike Peabody to cover this story, arriving as soon as the revolutionaries take over. Peabody hates being sent to the incident, which is customary for all of the places he’s sent. While the sketch is excellent, they forgot to mention the fascinating fact that only seven prisoners were in the Bastille, plus it was about to get destroyed anyway.

#19: Ready, Steady, Feast - Great Fire of London

It’s pretty obvious which cooking show was parodied for this recurring segment. One of our favorites was when Thomas Farriner explained how to cook London. For those unaware, he was the man allegedly responsible for the Great Fire of London in 1666. This scene ended up being one of many where Mat and Jim laughed uncontrollably while filming. While Mat’s role is hilarious, it’s unsurprisingly not too accurate to the real person. Farriner survived the real fire but refused to accept responsibility, blaming Robert Hubert for setting London ablaze. Thankfully, Farriner isn’t around today to accuse them of libel.

#18: Normonopoly

The Norman Conquest of 1066 is one of the most historically significant invasions of England. In reality, it was a pretty dark time to live through, as were most of the events parodied in “Horrible Histories.” This juxtaposition provides a ton of humor, as proven by this advert for a fake board game Normonopoly. As comedic as it is, the gamification of the invasion is already a real thing. Those board games look way more balanced, and therefore a lot less fun, than Normonopoly. We’d try to avoid playing it with William the Conqueror, though, as he seems like a pretty cutthroat gamer.

#17: Guy Fawkes Safety Tips

The figure most associated with the Gunpowder Plot is Guy Fawkes. He was part of a group of Catholics who tried blowing up Parliament, but it fell apart when authorities were tipped off. They found Fawkes guarding the explosives, and his name went down in history for it. Here, we see Fawkes sarcastically explaining to us how to safely blow up Parliament. While Fawkes was the one captured by authorities, in reality, he wasn’t the leader of the plot, but he was the major fall guy. While the sketch is humorous, there’s a tiny inaccuraacy. Fawkes was sentenced to be hanged, drawn, and quartered, but broke his neck before the full punishment was carried out.

#16: Historical Desktop: Elizabeth I

While only one British Queen had a chance to browse the internet, “Horrible Histories” asked the amusing question, what if more monarchs had surfed the web? This is the recurring sketch, Historical Desktops, which was comedy gold. Our favorite featured Elizabeth I hunting for a husband. If, for whatever reason, she did have access to dating apps, there’s a massive chance this is how it would’ve gone down. Also, unlike most shows set during the Tudor era, they don’t shy away from showing how gross the figures would’ve looked. This is a stark contrast to other Tudor based dramas, where everyone’s conventionally attractive. The makeup is uncomfortably on point the whole sketch, plus it makes us relieved to live in an era without smallpox.

#15: Stupid Deaths: Knights Templar

No other sketches in the series have a jingle as catchy as the one for “Stupid Deaths.” One was created for almost every episode, and they were all a ton of fun. Well, for the viewers, not for the historical figures being parodied. One of the funniest is about the hilariously morbid way a group of crusaders perished in 1187. Every character seems pretty disappointed to be having their death ridiculed. Fans of the show instead believe it would be an honor to end up on this segment if they made it to the afterlife.

#14: Start of WWI

Schools often teach children about World War II before they learn how the First World War began. This is because it’s a headache to explain, since it was the result of a confusing web of alliance networks. Explaining this mess is the joke of this sketch, which, for many children, was the first time they truly learned how the war began. It’s one of many examples of why this show is so celebrated; it makes dark topics amusing, but it’s rarely done in poor taste, nor is it condescending, meaning viewers of all ages learn something new every episode.

#13: Historical MasterChef - Anne, Stuart Lady

Another top tier recurring sketch is Historical MasterChef. While all of them are hits, our personal favorite is the Slimy Stuart, Anne. The dish she thinks can win her the competition is whale phlegm and rotten pineapple, something we’d love to see the actual “MasterChef” judges try. While it sounds disgusting, all other contestants cooked equally bad things. Other highlights included the Saxon Man, who ended up in jail after selling his son for ingredients. This made him the only one not to advance to the next round. Any episode featuring someone from either World War also made putrid meals.

#12: British Empire Report

Bob Hale did so many reports for HHTV News that they could justify having their own list. Out of all of them, our favorite was about our own British Empire. If you grew up watching “Horrible Histories,” there’s a strong chance this was your introduction to our Empire’s history. Hale explains it in record time, as is traditional, which means tons of details were missed. One such detail was not mentioning New Zealand, a country commonly missed out of maps and such. So, don’t forward this clip to any New Zealanders you know. Despite that, no one has explained the Empire better in less than 3 minutes, so our hats go off to Bob Hale.

#11: Earl Sandwich

You might expect the concept of a sandwich to have existed for as long as we’ve had bread. This sketch taught many of us that this kind of wasn’t the case. Turns out, John Montagu, the 4th Earl of Sandwich, is credited with inventing them. That’s because he wanted a way to eat while gambling. Such an idea is obviously somewhat contentious, as people had been wrapping their food in bread for thousands of years before the Earl came along. It’s not the only invention named after an Earl; cardigans were as well. So, if their Earldoms had been swapped, we could be eating cardigans and wearing sandwiches today.

#10: Ready, Steady, Feast - WW1

The first episode kicked off the series with a strong start, featuring iconic sketches like the German soldier on “Ready, Steady, Feast.” The show’s most disgusting moment is difficult to determine, but anything related to the First World War was particularly revolting. The soldier’s supper is atrocious, but it’s the milkman’s product that makes the host vomit. The sketch shows a few examples of German ersatz foods, but loads of others weren’t mentioned. It’s probably best you avoid researching them, though, unless you have an interest in disgusting foods. You may be glad to learn that not all soldiers had such awful meals, as the Allies would’ve had more appealing canned meals than the Germans.

#9: Viking vs Monk

Another excellent moment from the first episode was the original video game sketch. This was a recurring bit showcasing morbidly hysterical historical video games. All were amusing, but none topped the original showing Viking vs Monk. The humour is dark as always, making jokes about the brutality of the Viking conquests. On the bright side, it does a great job at teaching children about the period, as they’re more likely to remember an engaging sketch than a dry documentary. Many viewers wished these were real games, but others think they’d be too violent and one-sided, although that’s true to history.

#8: Shouty Man: Pee-Sil

We’ve finally made it to one of the most beloved recurring sketches - the iconic shouty man. The sidesplitting character debuted in episode 2, where he marketed a revolting medieval cleaning method. While you’d expect to throw up if you washed your clothes in urine, the shouty man’s charisma almost makes us want to try it regardless. The salesman was so adored that he appeared in all 5 of the original seasons. A little research reveals that it wasn’t only people in the Middle Ages who did their laundry this way. The practice goes all the way back to the Romans and was carried on until the Victorian era. So, humans have been washing their clothes with pee for far longer than with washing machines.

#7: Alexandria

Few historical figures had a larger ego than Alexander the Great. In fairness, we’re still talking about him over 2,000 years after his death, so you could easily argue it was justified. One of the clearest examples of his self-obsession comes from his city names. As far as depictions of Alexander go, this is easily one of the most unique. Rather than presenting him as a standard Hollywood hero, he feels more like a spoiled child than an acclaimed conqueror-general. Some historians do argue that Alexander displayed narcissistic traits, so there’s a chance this could be the most accurate depiction of him. We’ll never truly know without time travel.

#6: Historical Wife Swap - Civil War Edition

The 2000s reality show “Wife Swap” was pretty bizarre in hindsight. This led to it being parodied extensively, especially in “Horrible Histories.” While all were iconic, our favorite was the first, which swapped the wives of two rival families during the English Civil War. It’s one of many sketches that did an amazing job at educating children, while being hilarious the whole time. Another great wife swap sketch worth mentioning featured Louis XVI and Marie Antoinette, which led to the French Revolution. It’s obviously wildly inaccurate, but if they did try “Wife Swap” in the 1780s, we imagine this is exactly how it would’ve happened.

#5: Tudor Football

Modern football culture looks extremely relaxed compared to what the Tudors were doing. As the sketch reveals, these games could quickly turn into a bloodbath. It more resembles a fight between villages than the sport we play today. While this is a Tudor sketch, the Kingdom of England had been struggling with the sport for centuries. Over 30 attempts were made to ban the sport between 1314 and 1667, as it was just so violent. Another reason was that it stopped people from practising archery, something all Englishmen were required to do in the Middle Ages.

#4: Victorian Names

During the 2010s, “Game of Thrones” was so popular that thousands of children were being named after characters. If you thought this was bizarre, just wait until you hear what Victorians called their babies. This is the setup for this sketch, which scratches the surface of outlandish Victorian names that were weirdly common. These names have thankfully all fallen out of fashion. It makes us glad that Queen Victoria had a normal name. If her parents had followed these trends, there’s a chance we could be referring to the 19th century as the Toilet era.

#3: George IV's Dad's Dead

Few monarchs had as many health issues as King George III did. This meant his son spent a long 9 years as prince regent. The moment when he finally became king in 1820 made for one of the greatest sketches in the series. It was also one of the hardest scenes to film, as Jim Howick’s celebratory dance kept breaking the cast. In total, George IV waited 57 years to become king. Compared to how long Charles was a prince, that’s a short wait, as he spent over 70 years as heir. Charles was probably a more loving son than George IV, though, who famously had a strained relationship with his father.

#2: Shouty Man: Victorian Child

Another memorable shouty man sketch comes from the Vile Victorian era. It discusses the exceptionally dark period of British history when child labor was normalised. The life of a chimney sweep would’ve been horrific, but here, we see how they would’ve been commercialised if Victorians had television. Sketches like these make us think “Horrible Histories” just might have the darkest jokes in children’s TV history. If it’s a bit too morbid for you to watch, don’t delve deeper into the history of chimney sweeps. Turns out, the reality was even worse than it’s presented here.

#1: Caligula vs Poseidon

Any sketches featuring the Roman Emperor Caligula are so whimsical, it’s tough to believe they’re accurate. He only ruled for about 4 years, but managed to be so chaotic that he’s considered one of Rome’s worst rulers. According to some historians, he declared war on the sea, then commanded his army to collect seashells as war trophies. It sounds too ridiculous to be real, but there is a surprising amount of truth to the story. There is significant debate over whether Caligula was truly crazy, but Simon Farnaby’s exaggerated performance is one of the best in the series, so we can’t criticise it one bit.

Do you have a favorite “Horrible Histories” moment, and did it make our list? Let us know in the comments below!