Top 5 Terrifying Snakes That Will Probably Kill You

Snake? Snake?! SNAAAAAKE!

With the announcement that a rare two-headed snake recently hatched in Pennsylvania, we’re once again reminded that these reptiles can both be cute as well as the stuff of nightmares. Just pray that you never run into these five!

#5: Sea Snake

Arguably the most toxic of all snakes, this aquatic creature spends its life in the water. Well, at least most of the time. Without gills, the sea snake, also called the Hydrophiinae and coral reef snake, must occasionally come up for air – however it won’t bite unless thoroughly provoked. Even if the sea snake does launch an attack on surprised fishermen, they’re very sparing in their use of venom. These guys don’t inject victims just for the hell of it. They’re much more likely to use their venom on unassuming fish. They also like to party: seeing dozens of them all together is not uncommon.

#4: Anaconda

If you’ve ever seen a movie in which ignorant tourists roam the Amazon, then you’ll probably recognize this snake. You know – the one that constricts and eats people whole. Not just people either – crocodiles, deer or anything unlucky enough to be engulfed in its wrath. The green anaconda is the largest snake in the world. They’ve been known to cannibalize each other, making them the most psychotic snakes as well. Even though an Anaconda won’t kill you with venom, it will squeeze the crap out of you, and just like that, you’ll be gone.

#3: King Cobra

When a snake has a royal nickname, you better respect its throne. Oddly enough, the king cobra isn’t actually a cobra or a “naja.” Instead, it’s in a class of its own called “Ophiophagus,” which actually means “snake-eater” – seriously. Blessed with a forked-tongue that transmits signals to something called a “Jacobson’s organ,” this highly intelligent serpent hunts down its victims with absolute stealth and swallows them before they even know what happened. In other words, stay away from the king cobra, because they don’t give a damn about selfie etiquette.

#2: Inland Taipan

Yet another venomous snake native to Australia, the inland taipan is the most toxic snake in existence. If you ever come across this lethal creature, just run as fast as you can in the opposite direction. Listen, the inland taipan doesn’t want trouble and neither does the coastal taipan – another dangerous snake. But if you anger it, the snake will make you pay. Some bites can be handled with time and the appropriate anti-venom, but if this fierce, small-scaled serpent strikes, the clock will be ticking. Theoretically, a human would last less than three full-length WatchMojo videos, or 45 minutes.

#1: Black Mamba

Speed. Agility. Size. Here’s an African snake that gives everybody the heebie jeebies. The fastest snake on earth, the black mamba tends to be aggressive and protective of its domain. This nasty creature inspired a codename in Quentin Tarantino’s film “Kill Bill.” NBA legend Kobe Bryant in turn adopted the same moniker to represent his skill set. Like most snakes, the black mamba doesn’t actively seek out human flesh, but mess around and you get schooled in the science of deadly venom. Before anti-venom, your chances of survival were basically 0 and even then, you’ve got under ¾ of an hour to live if you’re not treated – so it’s no wonder its bite is known as “the kiss of death.”

Be sure to check out the video below to see our picks for the Top 10 Largest Reptiles.