Top 10 Times Phoebe Was a Savage on Friends

The gang loves to mock Ross over his passionate interest in subjects they deem boring. Usually, it's good-natured ribbing, but Phoebe really takes things to the next level in this episode. She's positive Chandler's cheating on Monica after watching him enter a car with a pretty blonde woman. Rachel points out that her judgment calls aren't always as on point as she believes. However, Phoebe offers some compelling, albeit brutal, evidence that suggests otherwise. We certainly didn't see it coming, but her delivery is so perfect that we don't know whether to gasp or giggle. It's so catty that if Ross had been in earshot, her words would’ve had the power to make his boring stories go extinct.

Monica and Chandler argue after some earlier miscommunication ruined their date night plans. Both are convinced that the other person is wrong. Luckily, one person was keeping record of their entire exchange. Now, Phoebe could’ve pointed out the misunderstanding at the time to help them avoid this whole debacle. But using it as a plot point in her latest novel chronicling the misadventures of Marcia and Chester is more fun. Phoebe sits back and watches the drama unfold, even though she has the key to end it. But she’s not willing to reveal all quite yet. And when she does, it’s pretty diabolical. Is that any way to treat your friends?

Throughout the series, Phoebe sees Rachel’s jealous streak when Ross shows interest in other women. By season eight, we guess she’d had enough. While shopping for baby supplies, Ross hits it off with the sales assistant, much to Rachel’s frustration. Let’s just clear up that she doesn’t want to date Ross; she just wants his undivided attention. She shares her gripes with Phoebe, expecting her to respond with the same indignation. But Phoebe offers a different perspective, and Rachel’s not going to like it. Why offer friendly advice when you could provide a rude awakening with a sharp and wry quip? That’s just the Phoebe Buffay way.

#7: Making Her Doctor Cry “The One Hundredth”

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Giving birth can be a very special experience, but it can also be painful, so you’d want to do everything in your control to help things run smoothly. Understandably nervous about birthing triplets, Phoebe’s acerbic tongue goes into beast mode when things don’t go to plan. Her original doctor had an accident and is now incapacitated, and her replacement is a little too “Happy Days” for her liking. You’d hope the third time would be the charm, but not in this case. When Ross introduces a very youthful-looking doctor, Phoebe viciously questions his qualifications before scaring him off and making him cry. Luckily a hospital is the perfect location to treat all those burns.

Move over, Freud; there’s a new therapist in town! After watching Joey’s musical about the famous psychoanalyst, Chandler spots a beautiful woman among the audience. He doubts his chances with her, getting Ross to agree that she’s way out of his league. Being a wonderfully supportive friend, Phoebe tries to boost his self-confidence, but it comes out pretty insulting. You can always trust Phoebe to build her friends up and tear them down simultaneously. Yes, she was trying to help, but surely there’s a friendlier way to do so? Still, in this case, it worked since Chandler got the date. Sometimes you have to be cruel to be kind. But this was just plain cold.

Phoebe’s thrown so many jabs at Ross throughout the seasons that you’d be forgiven for thinking she just tolerates him as part of the group. She particularly loves to target his unsuccessful love life. In season three, while getting ready for Ross’ big event, Phoebe quips that Rachel’s setting the standard for paleontologists’ girlfriends. She also loves reminding Ross about his growing collection of failed marriages. The morning after Ross and Rachel’s not-so sober wedding, Phoebe cruelly tells the former that divorce is his thing. She even goes on a mini rant about how much he loves getting them. Her viciousness might have something to do with her morning beverages, but still!

Yes, that’s right, Phoebe does this not just once but twice. The first time is in season three when she confronts Malcolm, a man who’s been stalking her, mistaking her for Ursula. She wants to help him detox from her twin but ends up falling for him instead. They date for a little while until she discovers he’s still following her sister. Then in season eight, she meets Eric, a man Ursula’s seemingly duped into marrying her. Phoebe breaks up the relationship and keeps the spoils for herself. Ursula gets her revenge, and Eric realizes he can’t be with either Buffay. We know Phoebe and Ursula aren’t close, but whatever happened to sisters before misters?

As Phoebe’s due date gets closer, her hormones spiral, leaving her friends walking on eggshells whenever she’s around. When Monica and Rachel thoughtfully plan a baby shower for her, she’s so mean that we’re surprised her guests don’t just walk out. Worse still is when Rachel talks out how going to Ross and Emily’s wedding might be too hard. Phoebe feigns sympathy before ruthlessly blasting Rachel for whining about childish first-world problems. We later find out that her callousness was a cover for more painful feelings she was harboring, but that doesn’t make her words hurt less. It’s okay, Rachel; we care, and we’re sure Phoebe would’ve, if her hormones hadn’t taken over.

We know Phoebe had a rough time growing up, and had to do whatever it took to survive life on the streets. But this was a blast from the past none of us saw coming. While walking down the street with Ross, they’re approached by a mugger who turns out to be an old friend of Phoebe’s. Ross is shocked to discover how the pair know each other, and his memories of an old unpleasant experience come flooding back. The big twist is that he now considers the culprit who stole his backpack one of his closest friends. Now that’s savage. Sure, she returns the stolen property, but we’re not sure how you move on from something like this. Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions. The Taste of Evil, “The One with the List” No Phoebe, Don’t Hold Back, Say What You Really Think No Wonder Rachel’s Pregnant, “The One with the Halloween Party” Did Phoebe Forget Everything She Read in ”Be Your Own Wind Keeper?” Blasting Her Tardy Guests, “The One with Phoebe's Birthday Dinner” No One Keeps Phoebe Buffay Waiting Keeping Tabs on Her Friends’ Dating Lives, “The One In Massapequa” She’s Certainly Not Afraid to Share Her Opinion Arguing About Evolution, “The One Where Heckles Dies” Her Persistence Eventually Breaks Ross

Phoebe can be pretty snarky to her friends, but she’ll also use her barbed tongue to fiercely defend them. When she and Monica cater a funeral, the widow tries to use her loss to get out of paying. So, Phoebe takes matters into her own hands and spits out what might be her most savage call out of them all. She mercilessly lambastes the not-so-grieving wife in front of all her guests and demands she pays up. She then follows the lady out the room to collect. Needless to say, no one would dare shortchange Monica again. It always helps to have a friend like Phoebe Buffay in your corner.