20 Disturbing Nursery Rhyme Secrets That Will Ruin Your Childhood
“Old Mother Hubbard”
10 Disturbing Secrets About Nursery Rhymes That Will Ruin Your Childhood
On the surface, the most popular version of this tune is a rollercoaster of emotion. After all, it involved Old Mother Hubbard being unable to feed her dog, finding it had perished, and then discovering the pup was only playing a joke on her. Yet it’s theorized that Hubbard is meant to be Cardinal Thomas Wolsey, and the dog is King Henry VIII as he tried to have his marriage to Catherine of Aragon annulled. Wolsey was Henry’s chief advisor. But when he failed to secure the annulment, he was stripped of most of his power and banished. Later, Wolsey was told to return to London to face charges of treason, only to pass away on the journey.
“Little Polly Flinders”
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Nowadays, the term “Polly Flinders” is better known as a defunct children’s clothing brand. But long before then, it was better known as a nursery rhyme. Sung with a slightly sped-up version of the tune for “Baa, Baa, Black Sheep,” according to the lyrics, all Polly Flinders wanted to do was warm her feet -- sorry, “pretty little toes,” which is disturbing -- next to some burning cinders. But due to messing up her clothes, her mother was slightly annoyed but acted rationally, right? Nope, she whipped Flinders, which is a massive escalation. The moral was meant to be a message for girls to look after their clothes or face over-the-top punishment, apparently. It's weird how this song wasn't super popular (!)
“See Saw Margery Daw”
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On the surface, this short but cheery song seemed to be enjoyed best by kids as they played on a see-saw, going up and down to the tune. But it's speculated that it’s actually about child labor. Yep. The second lyric mentions Jacky having a new master. Then, the rest talks about his earnings and the struggle to meet the demands of his employer-slash-owner. As for the illustrious Margery Daw, she may have been added simply because of the rhyme, but the word “Daw” could also mean someone lazy or an untidy woman. There’s also a belief that the tune was created to help the youngsters keep time when working as a two-person sawyer team.
“Ladybird Ladybird”
For a song about a ladybird or a ladybug, it’s pretty morbid on the surface. After all, the most popular version of the lyrics is a warning to the insect to return home because it’s aflame and its kids have vanished, except Ann, who hid in a pan. Apparently, old-timey farmers would sing it before burning their harvest each season, as they respected the creatures. But to make this darker, it’s speculated that the Ladybirds were a stand-in for pagans when Christianity became mainstream. Telling the insect to fly home is meant to warn pagans to hide. Their fiery home is the temples being destroyed, and the children vanishing are the worshippers that were taken out. While Ann survived as she went underground.
“This Old Man”
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Many kids all over the place can attribute this nursery rhyme to helping them understand counting. With its whimsical lyrics of a strange old fellow tapping away on the protagonist’s items and body parts, it seems mostly harmless. But is it? Maybe not. Some people have claimed the song was a warning for children about a creepy man who lived in the community. Others have stated that it’s an anti-Irish song made by England. After all, the term “paddywhack” is featured. Paddy can be a derogatory word for the Irish, while whack means hitting. Some modern iterations of the song have changed the lyric to “patty whack.” While the term “rolling home” could be referring to Irish travelers and their caravans.
“Goosey Goosey Gander”
The lyrics for this tune are already pretty dark. After all, the protagonist finds a gentleman in a lady’s bedroom who wouldn’t pray. So, they chucked him down the stairs. In extended versions, the lines vividly describe the noise of that man’s journey as he fell. According to historians, the thrown chap is said to be a Catholic priest. Back in old England, Catholics weren’t beloved and were believed to break their vows of celibacy, hence being found in a lady’s chambers. In other theories, Protestants under Oliver Cromwell’s rule were encouraged to attack followers of Catholicism. When they entered a Catholic house, they would find the clergy in a “priest hole,” a special room to hide from persecution.
“Humpty Dumpty”
Fun fact. Not once does the song mention that Humpty Dumpty was an egg. Probably because when you think about his accident, it’s slightly less upsetting when you picture an anthropomorphic egg than a human. The phrase “Humpty Dumpty” was originally a term for a beverage of brandy with boiled ale. Then, it became slang for a clumsy person, then one for someone drunk. As such, there are theories the song is about someone inebriated who fell from a wall and was injured. Other ideas include Humpy Dumpty being King Richard III of England, who supposedly had a hunchback. The wall represented his reign, which ended during the Battle of Bosworth Field, even though he had a large army.
“Eeny, meeny, miny, moe”
Everyone at some point has recited this song when choosing between something. Even singing it well into adulthood. There are slight variations of it, such as between catching a Tiger or Tigger, either by its tail or toe. But one version is horrendously racist. During slavery, the word “tiger” was replaced with a racist slur. According to historians, this terrible version was popular with American children in the 1880s. Thankfully, the racist variant was abandoned in history. But every so often, it returns again, like a moldy, bad-luck-ridden penny. In 2014, then “Top Gear” presenter Jeremy Clarkson was recorded in rehearsal seemingly mumbling the slur as he sang the song, which he later denied and apologized for.
“Rock-a-bye Baby”
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The best nursery rhymes are the whimsical ones, like “Rock-a-bye Baby.” After all, the lyrics speak about a youngster in a cradle on top of a tree. Then, it takes a wild turn when it gets windy. Causing the cradle to get knocked off and fall to the ground. According to some historians, the song was more of a dark hope by the writer for the prospective child of King James II of England. After James had switched to Catholicism, the scribe dreamed that his heir wouldn’t grow up, leading to the belief that a Protestant ruler would take over. Regardless, it’s weird that this is the default song for people desperately trying to get children to sleep.
“Baa, Baa, Black Sheep”
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A song about a talking sheep? Sounds delightful! After being questioned about how much wool it has, the chatty creature states it has three bags, but they’re all spoken for. Researchers believe the lyrics are a jab at the heavy wool taxation by King Edward I of England, who demanded two-thirds for himself and the church, leaving the rest for the shepherd. The sheep being black was said to be bad luck as the wool was difficult to sell back then as it was hard to dye. Another idea is that the color of the sheep was a reference to the slave trade. Due to this, some people prefer the name change of “Baa, Baa, Rainbow Sheep.”
“Pop Goes the Weasel”
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For modern children, this nursery rhyme and singing game is just a whole lot of fun nonsense. The verses have evolved significantly over the years, and the contemporary American versions usually tell of a monkey chasing a weasel around a mulberry bush. But as the verses progress, the narrative begins to line up with the more traditional wording - it’s all about buying needle and thread, and little boys who are sick. In reality, this song is about abject poverty using Cockney rhyming slang. “Pop! Goes the weasel” is a person pawning their coat to buy themselves food and drink. The monkey represents looming debts and the demand for repayment. Not so fun anymore, is it?
“Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush”
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Considering how little time the average kid spends around mulberry bushes, it’s kind of ridiculous how present they are in popular nursery rhymes. But, like many nursery rhymes, “Here We Go Round the Mulberry Bush” dates back to the mid-19th century when kids had to get creative with mundane things to keep themselves entertained. Though this particular nursery rhyme seems innocent enough, one historian, R. S. Duncan, believes that it takes its roots from the Her Majesty's Prison Wakefield, where the female prisoners allegedly used to walk around a mulberry tree for exercise. Though this interpretation has been contested by some, it still makes for a grim mental picture.
“Georgie Porgie”
It might be a silly name, but “Georgie Porgie” has a got a very adult history behind it - at least according to one analysis. It’s been suggested that this popular nursery rhyme, often used as a schoolyard taunt, was actually a reference to the rumored homosexual love affair between a man named George Villiers and King James I. The speed with which Villiers’ position was elevated by King James raised eyebrows then as it still does now. The nursery rhyme not only mocks James and Villiers, but takes Villiers to task in another way, as he allegedly forced himself upon women.
“Jack and Jill”
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This particular nursery rhyme, more so than most, has a clear narrative. Jack and Jill go up at hill to get some water. Jack falls and hits his head, Jill quickly runs down the hill after him. In the later verses, it’s made clear that Jack survives, but when you end the story after the first verse, it’s more ambiguous. Well, it turns out that Jack and Jill may have been doing more on that hill than, ahem... fetching water. Kilmersdon, a village in Somerset, claims it to be a true story from their own history involving an affair that ended in an unwanted pregnancy, a fatal blow to the head for Jack, and the death of Jill during childbirth.
“Rub-A-Dub-Dub”
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Over time, nursery rhymes tend to evolve, often winding up substantially different from their original wording. Such is the case with “Rub-A-Dub-Dub.” The version best known today describes three men in a tub out at sea. It’s a funny image that continues to delight children to this day, especially since the men have such distinct professions. Here’s the thing though; in the original nursery rhyme, the butcher, the baker and the candlestick-maker weren’t in the tub… they were watching three women in the tub. That’s right, it was apparently some sort of peep show at the fair, and these three men were there to stare.
“Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary”
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Some argue the titular Mary in this nursery rhyme is none other than the mother of Jesus, and the bells, cockle shells, and pretty maids are all religious symbols. Others have suggested that it’s about Mary I of England however, and it’s a pretty sinister depiction. Queen Mary famously had fertility problems, which could be what the line “How does your garden grow?” refers to. She also earned herself the nickname “Bloody Mary” when she had Protestants killed, and some believe the bells and shells the rhyme mentions are instruments of torture, and the “pretty maids all in a row” to be guillotines. Similarly, Mary I of England is also thought to be the farmer’s wife in “Three Blind Mice.”
“It's Raining, It's Pouring”
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Absurdly catchy and sure to pop into your head any time it rains, this popular nursery rhyme, sadly, is about much more than a rainy day. Innocent as we are when we’re kids, we feel bad for the old man who bumps his head, but we assume that he was simply too groggy, sore, or disoriented to rise in the morning. The thing is… he’s not taking a sick day; that bump on the head in the night was likely a fatal one. He couldn’t get up the next morning, or any morning after that.
“Ten Little Indians”
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It’s easy enough to see why this particular nursery rhyme is problematic; just look at that title. While most of the nursery rhymes listed today are English in origin, this one is distinctly American-made. The nursery rhyme dates back to the 19th century, and was adapted into a full-length song in 1868 by songwriter Septimus Winner, entitled “Ten Little Injuns.” Another version also switched the word “indian” for a racial slur. Regardless of the version you’ve encountered, it’s a racist nursery rhyme that at the very least mocks the intelligence and capabilities of indigenous people, but can equally be seen as a story of genocide.
“Ring a Ring o' Rosie”
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The central line of this nursery rhyme was originally “Ring a Ring o' Roses” and has been interpreted a number of ways, but it’s most popularly seen as an instructional singing game involving an intentional fall or curtsy. One of the most common myths is that it’s talking about either the Black Death in the mid-14th century or the Great Plague of London in the mid-17th. The sneezing and falling down are now retroactively seen as signs of illness and death resulting from the plague. Posies were supposedly carried around for their purported protective purposes, the rosy was the rash, and the ashes… well, a lot of bodies were burned after they “all fell down.” Even if that’s not the inspiration, pretty grim, huh?
“London Bridge Is Falling Down”
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This famous singing game is known to date back to the 17th century, but quite possibly much earlier. The melody is catchy and the accompanying game can provide children with hours of fun, just so long as you don’t dig too deep into the origins of the nursery rhyme. There are three predominant theories. One is the story of a Viking attack and the apparent wrecking of the London bridge. The second is simply that it’s inspired by a fire that struck in 1633. The last and most haunting, however, is that children were buried - maybe alive - in the foundation for superstitious reasons. Aren’t you glad it’s stuck in your head now? Which nursery rhyme is your favorite and have we ruined it forever? Let us know below!
