Top 10 Times Squidward was the Most Relatable Character on SpongeBob SquarePants
#10: Working to Live, Living to Work
“My Pretty Seahorse”
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Being an adult sucks sometimes, and no one understands that better than Squidward Tentacles. If there’s one thing we know about him it’s that he’s a realist, the epitome of disillusionment. In this episode, SpongeBob is busy trying to wrangle a hungry seahorse during a shift at the Krusty Krab. Squidward’s perpetually frustrated with his co-worker’s antics and reminds him of their sad reality. Squidward’s far from living his dreams at this point, and he’s very much aware that he’ll likely spend the rest of his life, or at least 40 years, doing the same dead-end job.
#9: Work Hurts
"SpongeBob Meets the Strangler"
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Speaking of workplace monotony, how many of us have felt the physical aches and pains of working? This is notably true for those in the customer service industry. Squidward is around endless loud noises coming from his over-the-top boss Mr. Krabs, who’s known for yelling quite often. There’s also SpongeBob’s pronounced laughter or whatever destruction he and Patrick cause, something he deals with at home, too. A lot of people can identify with his experience and the daily side effects of what feels like tiring, meaningless work. No wonder his on-time percentage is only 12%.
#8: Visualizations Gone Wrong
"Squilliam Returns"
When Squidward runs into his age-old rival Squilliam Fancyson, he’s instantly on edge. That’s probably because the two can’t have a conversation that doesn’t involve comparing Squilliam’s successes to Squidward’s failures. Jealousy is something everyone feels at some point. And even if you despise the person, you may feel like you need to prove yourself to them, so we fully understand Squidward’s reaction. In a moment of panic, he tries to picture the smug Squilliam in his skivvies. But what’s intended as a calming tactic ends up revealing another positive attribute. Mr. Fancyson has abs (at least in Squidward’s imagination), which our friend likely doesn’t. To impress his enemy, he lies about his career, leading to more stress and panic. Squiddy can’t catch a break.
#7: Excellent Customer Service
"Bubble Buddy"
After working at the Krusty Krab for years, Squidward’s trademark bitterness shouldn’t be a surprise to anyone, especially the patrons. We’re not sure if this customer was particularly unpleasant or he just had the audacity to order food while Squidward was working. But Squidward tells them what he really feels which many of us wish we could say. Shortly after this exchange, he’s forced to participate in more of SpongeBob’s nautical nonsense. He quickly loses the little patience he had while he’s making and remaking Bubble Buddy’s order. He’s sure to serve up a hefty side of sarcasm, making those who’ve been waitstaff feel seen.
#6: Napping on the Job
"Gullible Pants"
Many would agree one of the most relatable things about Squidward is that he’s always tired. He usually doesn’t have anything to really look forward to, so we totally understand his desire to sleep instead. He also hates his job and avoids his cashier duties whenever possible, and when he’s not reading, his favorite thing to do at work is take a nap. But when Mr. Krabs temporarily leaves SpongeBob in charge, it’s impossible for him to get some mid-shift shut-eye. And while he has some fun playing tricks on his co-worker, he’d seemingly still rather catch some z’s. Honestly…same.
#5: “Just Hit Me”
"Graveyard Shift"
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What’s worse than working overtime? Working overtime with an annoying co-worker. Of course, the greedy Mr. Krabs gets to go home, leaving his underlings to do the late-night shift that didn’t even exist until one customer showed up after hours. Naturally, SpongeBob is all about extra work, and finds it even more exciting doing it at night. Squidward, on the other hand, knows he’s in for some insufferable stupidity tonight and asks a customer to give him a nice bonk with a bat. Will that improve the shift? Probably not, but we can’t say we wouldn’t do the same thing.
#4: Overindulging in Fast Food
“Just One Bite”
We all have our favorite foods, and sometimes we just feel the need to pig out. And if someone tries to interrupt your binge, the hangriness comes out. That’s basically how Squidward feels after he develops an instant love for Krabby Patties. He tries to get a bite – or several – on the down low, because he understandably doesn’t want SpongeBob to know he was right. But Squiddy finally hits his breaking point and goes all out in the patty vault, until SpongeBob’s warning sinks in. We know that familiar feeling of being so overstuffed you feel like you might explode. Except in Squidward’s case, it actually happens.
#3: The Hate Is Real
“Karate Choppers”
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Squidward sometimes gets flack for his bad attitude, but that doesn’t stop him from being his salty self. Given the chaos that surrounds him on a daily basis, like the crazy karate-chopping in this moment, we’d expect nothing less than one of his brutally honest quips. Who doesn’t know what it’s like to feel cranky while those around you are being annoyingly chipper? And if they’re having fun working while you’re miserable on the job? Well, that’s just another reason to declare your hatred for their obnoxious optimism. But when you’re the one in high spirits, the same people might not always approve of your brand of humor.
#2: Welcoming a Swift End
“Band Geeks”
When Squidward’s high school nemesis Squilliam Fancyson invites him and his nonexistent band to perform at the Bubble Bowl on short notice, the aspiring artist scrambles to put one together. He knows this is actually a challenge and not a good-natured invite, so his reputation and dreams are on the line. Luckily, he – like the more confident among us – already knows he’s got the stuff. But when it becomes apparent that this makeshift band is a hopeless mess, he wouldn’t mind permanently bowing out of life. It’s dark for a kids’ show, but saying Squidward is cynical would be an understatement. And that deadpan energy is sure to resonate with many of us. At least there’s a happy ending to this one.
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
Overwhelmed by the Future, “SB-129”
When You’re Having an Existential Crisis & Your Brain Stops Working for a Minute
Squidward the Soulless, “Just One Bite”
We’re Not All Angels, Okay?
Forever Alone, “Love That Squid”
Being a Voice for All the Singles Out There
Just One of Those Days, "Are You Happy Now?"
Sometimes We Just Want to Stay in Bed
Summarizing Emotions, “Bossy Boots”
When You’ve Lost the Energy to Communicate Your Frustration in Complete Sentences
#1: Quitting the Job He Loathes
“Can You Spare a Dime?”
We’ve established that Squidward Tentacles generally despises his occupation, employer, co-worker, and everyone who walks through those doors. He’s quit the Krusty Krab many times, but always finds himself back at the register. We enjoy this particular instance because Squidward tells SpongeBob he’d rather be dead than continue working there. Who hasn’t been there before? But homes are expensive, even without the cost of what we assume are endless repairs from a sponge and starfish regularly destroying his. So, after mooching off his too-kind-of-a-neighbor, he returns to his minimum-wage job because, let’s face it, people need to make money. Sadly, it seems no one wanted to pay him to dance or play the clarinet. That’s all too real.
