Top 10 Jean-Claude Van Damme Splits
He has the most famous groin muscles in movie history. Join http://www.WatchMojo.com as we count down our picks for the top 10 Jean-Claude Van Damme splits. For this list, we're taking a look at those instances when the Muscles from Brussels delighted fans with a spectacular show of crotchular flexibility. We may have grown accustomed to seeing Van Damme drop down and get his eagle on, but we haven't grown tired of it. Especially not when he's finding new and exciting ways to make us reflexively cross our legs.
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Top 10 Jean-Claude Van Damme Splits
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He has the most famous groin muscles in movie history. Welcome to WatchMojo.com and today we’re counting down our picks for the top 10 Jean-Claude Van Damme splits. For this list, we’re taking a look at those instances when the Muscles from Brussels delighted fans with a spectacular show of crotchular flexibility. We may have grown accustomed to seeing Van Damme drop down and get his eagle on, but we haven’t grown tired of it. Especially not when he’s finding new and exciting ways to make us reflexively cross our legs.
#10: Low Blow “Bloodsport” (1988)
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When you’re up against a veritable giant of a man in what could turn out to be a martial-arts battle to the death, you might have to pull out your absolute best tricks. In JCVD’s case, that means dropping into a split and executing an uppercut to your opponent’s frank and beans. It certainly worked enough to fully incapacitate his adversary in this case, but what about his own hot pocket? Does it not suffer?
#9: Splitting Tiger, Hidden Van Damme “Cyborg” (1989)
We all know that when you’re a pirate in a post apocalyptic wasteland, you have no time to look up, especially not when you’re on the attack. Because if you did look up, you’d see the groin of a man perched in an exquisite split, waiting to kill slice the hell outta you. It may be an unconventional way to lay in wait for your target, but this is Van Damme we’re talking about.
#8: Feel the Stretch “Kickboxer” (1989)
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Every once in a while, you may wonder how you can get your legs ready to bust out a split at a moment’s notice, and the answer isn’t a pilates machine. It involves ropes, the jungle, and having a trainer who wants to ensure you reach maximum splits efficiency. And, when you’re trying to get revenge on the man who paralyzed your brother in the kickboxing ring, you’re gonna need that efficiency. Although it looks like JCVD can’t handle the strain, we know he’s faking it. He’d split his legs behind his body if he could.
#7: Dancing Machine “Kickboxer” (1989)
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This little tidbit may be missing from the pick-up artist manual, but the ladies love a good split. Especially if you’re some random ex-pat they’re dancing with and you drop down into a split twice for no discernable reason – It’s irresistible. JCVD actually manages to get in yet another split in this very scene while fighting off a group of attackers. Because his splits aren’t just sexy, they’re also useful.
#6: Knives & Splits “Black Eagle” (1988)
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We’re wondering if JCVD’s character just asked for two barrels and a fistful of knives and told everybody to stand back and watch the show. That’s really the only way this particular scene makes sense in a film about Cold War paranoia, missing scientists and top-secret weapons. There are a myriad of ways to waste time when you’re a KGB agent aboard a seafaring vessel; and shirtless, mid-split knife throwing seems as good an activity as any. And it clearly boosts crew morale.
#5: Ladies Love Cool Splits “Double Impact” (1991)
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If you were doubting the effectiveness of the splits as a tool of seduction, you obviously haven’t seen Van Damme’s courting methods. He takes a moment away from manhandling a woman he’s helping stretch to drop down into a split in front of a gaggle of lady gym goers, like it’s nothing. From the oohs and ahhs of his captive audience, clearly both the spandex and the split are the best way for him to display his…talents.
#4: On the Ropes “No Retreat, No Surrender” (1986)
You know those moments when you’re in the middle of a full contact karate match and look over and your bad guy Russian opponent is doing the splits on the ropes while staring you in the eye? You can thank Jean-Claude Van Damme for those moments. In fact, you can thank him for punctuating all of his fights with splits, because it adds an artistic flair usually lacking in brutal attacks.
#3: Splitting on the Edge “Bloodsport” (1988)
There are times when we need to step back from the hustle and bustle of life, take a break, and center our thoughts. While for some of us, that might mean taking a nap or reading a book, for JCVD, that translates to spread eagle meditation while perched on a balcony ledge. Because nothing says “serenity” like unnecessarily dangerous displays of flexibility, set to ‘80s pop rock.
#2: Safety Split “Timecop” (1994)
It seems like none of Jean-Claude Van Damme’s characters can catch a break. He’s a Time Enforcement Commission Agent whose wife was killed ten-years ago, and he’s just come back from a bad day at the office, so he wants to take a nap. But, two goons break into his home and he’s forced to defend himself. After making short work of one henchman, he’s faced with another genius armed with a taser. In true JCVD fashion, the best course of action to avoid an electric shock is to jump into an impressive split on the counter. Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions: - Kumite Training “Bloodsport” (1988) - Bakery Bongos Go Daddy commercial (2013) - Door Jamb Stretch “Double Team” (1997) - Talk Show Splits “The Arsenio Hall Show” (1990)
#1: The Legend Returns Volvo commercial (2013)
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After a lifetime of gracing audiences with his unparalleled on-screen splitting ability, JCVD decided to show folks that he’s still got it. What better way to let us know that you’re not having a mid-life crisis than to do the splits atop two moving Volvo 18-wheelers? All jokes aside, it’s actually pretty incredible, and contrary to what you might be thinking was apparently not a green screen effect. It may’ve had us silently cringing the whole time, but it spawned many, equally epic internet parodies. Do you agree with our list? What do you think is Van Damme’s greatest split? For more entertaining Top 10s published every day, be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com.
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