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Top 10 Signs That You Are a Hipster

VO: Rebecca Brayton
Script written by Q.V. Hough These are ironic realities of so many modern day millennials. Join WatchMojo.com as we count down our picks for the top 10 signs that you’re a hipster. For this list, we'll be looking at behaviors, preferences, tendencies, interests and so forth that signal that you just may be a hipster. Special thanks to our users Robert Bruno Reyes for submitting the idea using our interactive suggestion tool at WatchMojo.comsuggest
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Transcript
Script written by Q.V. Hough

Top 10 Signs That You’re A Hipster


These are ironic realities of so many modern day millennials. Welcome to WatchMojo.com, and today we’re counting down our picks for the top 10 signs that you’re a hipster.

For this list, we’ll be looking at behaviors, preferences, tendencies, interests and so forth that signal that you just may be a hipster. Does just one of the entries on our list make you a hipster? No, but when viewed as a whole, you may notice a shocking truth. For the record, this isn’t meant to offend or to be taken seriously – it’s all in good fun!

#10: You Frequent Independent, Local Coffee Houses

Hipsters love them some coffee, and they despise you and your 99-cent brew from the gas station. They’ll openly express concern for your java selections at the local indie coffee shop – aka the hipster's gym where they can flex their intellectual muscles by spouting the latest theories, all the while keeping an eye on the coffee enthusiasts that come and go from their favorite spot. The independent coffee house allows for a super relaxing break from reality - but sadly, many hipsters only fuel their anxieties at the coffee shop, making them all the more likely to voice their grievances elsewhere.

#9: You Live in a Hipster-centric Town

Brooklyn-Minneapolis-Austin-Portland. These cities represent the trail of the millennial hipster exchange in the U.S. At least one of your hipster friends made the professional move to one of the big four. But even if he or she absolutely loves his or her new hipster-friendly city, you’ve probably heard him or her mention a possible relocation, depending on which city now seems to be the most trendy among hipsters… who by the way, totally don’t pay attention to that stuff. For the serious hipster, Brooklyn represents a rite of passage, but who knows where the next hot spot will be? Hopkins, Minnesota? Chattanooga, Tennessee? Moose Jaw?

#8: You Have a Strong Interest in “Handmade,” “Independent” & “Craft” Things

Regardless of a hipster’s maturity level, it’s always important to establish one’s independence by expressing intense devotion to at least one specific art form, and preferably many. Some hipsters have long supported their favorite indie band. Others need some time to fully transition into the person that never shuts up about everything handmade, whether it’s at the local coffeehouse or perhaps the latest local micro-brewery, where you’ll be forced into some day drinking while learning about every band that will be playing within walking distance that week.

#7: You Collect Records & Other Antiquities

Oh, you download MP3s and listen to Spotify? Ugh. While it’s not yet possible to physically time travel, don’t tell a hipster that. Why? Because he or she somehow knows everything about the Vinyl Age due to endless hours of roaming about record stores and posturing as if we were back in those days - and not a time when it’s socially acceptable to mumble and stare at your phone while in conversation with another human being. The hipster always has at least one vintage accessory on hand, usually a camera, and while it may be digital, it still has the feel and look of something from the past.

#6: You Own a Fixed Gear Bike / Unicycle

If you’re a modern day hipster, you're likely living in a hipster neighborhood, riding to and fro on some of type of fixed gear bicycle to cruise around town. Do you bike for exercise? No, of course you don’t bike for cardio; you bike to promote your personal brand and the whole package you got goin’ on. And if you’re really on top of your game, then you own yourself a unicycle, which obviously draws attention and further strengthens the identity you crave.

#5: You Wear Thick, Horn-Rimmed Glasses

Here’s another essential component of the hipster-branding package: a pair of large black specs that allow for versatility in conversation… even if you don’t actually need them. You just rock massive horn-rimmed specs because of the intellectual vibe, and because they make you more interesting too - whether you’ve got them propped down low on your nose or if you’re someone that likes to stick your nose in the air during a tense verbal battle on some ridiculously subjective topic. They just provide a little extra flair and somehow bring more weight to your words.

#4: You Can’t Speak Honestly Without Sarcastic Humor

Now this is what you call a paradox: a seemingly gentle hipster individual that exudes a quiet rage with masked, sarcastic humor. Despite knowing that you’re in the actual presence of a hipster, it still might take the basic individual a few seconds just to process that you’re actually being patronized or at the receiving end of a passive-aggressive tongue-lashing. The sarcastic hipster is one that likes to remind of his or her affinity for sarcasm - as if we didn’t already know of it - yet they still think it’s cute and quirky – and not at all predictable and boring.

#3: You Have a Beard / Mustache / Long(ish) Hair

At this very moment, one of you is in the process of growing out a sprawling beard. But it's not for warmth on the high seas; it’s because you think it looks cool… because it makes you look like, yes, a classic hipster. You just don’t see buzz-cutted and baby faced hipsters. Instead, hipsters favor a pairing of long, messy tresses with an aggressive patch of facial hair groomed oh-so-carefully into that just-woke-up-and-couldn't-care-less-about-their-appearance look. It's an irony so deep even the ironic are not aware of just how ironic it truly is, ironically.

#2: You Wear Plaid Shirts / Tight Jeans / Ironic T-Shirts

It’s the trifecta of absolute hipsterdom: plaid top, skinny jeans and that clever tee that immediately makes a bold statement about your intellectual prowess. If you’ve actually squeezed your body into a pair of skinny jeans, regardless of your actual size or shape, then you have hipster tendencies. And if you’re already known for wearing a plethora of plaid tops, well, you’re either wearing the uniform of hipsters or are a lumberjack... which is okay. It doesn’t really matter if you go shopping alone at the thrift shop either, because just your physical presence in such a store adds to your obvious hipster vibe.

Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
You Own a Pair of Brogues
You Listen to Bands That Have Animal or an Animal in Their Name
You Refuse to Acknowledge Your Hipsterdom
You’re Your Own Boss

#1: You Hate the Mainstream

Rage against the machine, rage against it! That’s right, you knew about The Black Keys and The White Stripes before they were staples of pop culture, but now you just despise them, based mainly on the fact that less-informed individuals invaded your musical space. You’re also just alittle bit smarter than most when it comes to the arts and living a fruitful life in general. And you’ve got at least one issue that’s deeply important to you right now, but unfortunately won’t be important enough next year when life changes a bit and it starts becoming the cool thing to do. You hate the mainstream, but you still need it… if only to hate it.

Do you agree with our list? What do you think defines a hipster? For more hip Top 10s published daily, be sure to subscribe to WatchMojo.com.
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