Top 10 Pathetic Video Game Foes

Credits: Dan Mike
These disposable minions are the backbone of most video game experiences. From Goombas to brainless zombies, they go down in great numbers and put up little resistance. That's right, we're listing and paying our respects to the countless nameless baddies who are there just to get stomped on or shot with little hope of stopping you. Join as we count down the top 10 most pathetic video game foes.
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Top 10 Pathetic Video Game Foes

These pixilated minions are the very definition of cannon fodder. Welcome to and today we’ll be counting down the top 10 most pathetic video game foes.

Just to be clear, we’re focusing only on disposable mobs and not bosses or mini-bosses.

#10- Genome Soldiers “Metal Gear Solid Series” (1998-)

Kicking off our list are the super soldiers working for Big Boss. Traitors to the US government, these soldiers were created to combat terrorism, only to dish it out. Sadly, in effect this meant getting fooled by boxes, and completely forgetting about you after you leave their line of sight, even if you just killed one of their comrades. Best known for showing their surprise with an exclamation mark, it never took much to take these guys out of commission.

#9- Head-Crab Zombies “Half Life Series” (1998-)

In this series, when an alien head crab attaches to a host, it gains the ability to control their victim’s body. This means a lotta blood, claw hands and a chest mouth. As scary as that sight maybe be, it doesn’t take much to put these brainless suckers down or simply run around them. As such, they’re only a challenge in large hordes, like any other zombie. The difference is that you have a full arsenal and gravity gun to make short work of ‘em.

#8- Kremlings “Donkey Kong Country Series” (1994-1996)

Members of the Kremling pirate ship crew, these crocodiles come in many varieties, ranging from traditional to fully anthropomorphic. Regardless of type or size they all go down with a simple jump on the head or by rolling your furry hide into them. Their seemingly all male society operates on strength over brains, and it shows.

#7- Moblins “The Legend of Zelda Series” (1986-)

The muscle of Ganon’s army, these beasts have transitioned from bulldog in appearance to warthog-ish complexion. Originally keeping to wooded areas, they throw spears at you, which are useless against Link’s shield. The true definition of cannon fodder, they beasts a mere bumps in the road on your quest for the Triforce.

#6- Foot Soldiers “Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Series” (1989- 1992)

These martial arts robots are the main enemies throughout the original Ninja Turtles video games series. Appearing in various colors, but mainly in purple, they are simple to destroy and pose little opposition. In fact their greatest attack is blocking and grabbing, which is more annoying than anything else.

#5- Radroaches “Fallout 3” (2008)

These things are eradiated cockroaches that have mutated to housecat-sized proportions! Sounds pleasant right? Mainly found in underground areas, they are generally mere pests that don’t even pose much of a threat in large numbers, despite how utterly terrifying they would be in real life. Simply put, anyone can kill them with their bare heads. Besides, they aren’t even very aggressive and only attack if you go too close.

#4- The Broom Hatter “Kirby Series (1992-)

This gal may have a wicked witch hat and broom, but she’s almost completely harmless. A clean freak, all he wants to do is sweep away dust, meaning that she can’t be bothered with attacking the puffball. You’d think you’d get more of a challenge from a magical creature with no face, but I guess this is dreamland after all, not nightmare land.

#3- Rats “All RPG’s”

Try to think of one fantasy game that doesn’t start you off killing these poor generally defenseless vermin. Whether you’re making your way trough a dungeon or a sewer tunnel, these hungry little pests will simply provide you your first opponent to squish under your feet before you’ve gained enough levels to earn your stripes as a bad ass. So no, you won’t take pride exterminating them as its too easy.

#2- Grunts “Halo Series” (2001-)

These tiny, oafish alien troops are the lowest ranking members of the Covenant forces, which is something that seems painfully apparent from early on. As the weakest foes in the game, you will slay countless of these guys and never take massive damage to your over shield. They’re pretty much meant to slow you down and distract you from the real threats.

#1- Goombas “Super Mario Bros Series” (1985-)

Was there any doubt? Taking the top spot on our list are the brave, but foolish shitake mushroom inspired people in service of King Bowser. These literally unarmed foes move shuffle forward aimlessly only to get squished under the feet of some surprisingly nimble plumbers. They’re slow, dumb and function more as an obstacle than an enemy, making it all the more embarrassing when they actually hit you. But hey, whatever doesn’t kill you, only makes you smaller.

Do you agree with our list? Which video game foe do you consider the most pathetic? For more entertaining top 10s, be sure to subscribe to

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