Top 10 Craziest Things You Can Buy on Amazon

#10: The Purrfect DVD - Cat Entertainment Video

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Have you ever noticed that there’s not nearly enough quality entertainment out there specifically designed for the feline demographic? No? Well… that didn’t stop TV Time Productions from making the “Citizen Kane” of animal stimulation videos. Described as “entertainment bliss for your cat,” The Purrfect DVD features images of birds, mice, bugs, and fish… and that’s about it. Complete with a looping function, it’ll keep your cat glued to the TV screen for hours on end. Because you know, after a long, hard day of lounging around the house, cats need to unwind with a little television. While by no means an essential purchase, this DVD is an ideal gag gift for cat lovers.

#9: Five $2 Bills

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When shopping on Amazon, people have the tendency to make rash, unnecessary purchases. If you find yourself buying money, however, somebody else should really be handling your finances. For over $10, you can buy five $2 bills in a reinforced plastic case. Assuming you can do basic arithmetic, you should be able to see why this doesn’t add up. While the product description claims $2 bills are rare, that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re worth more than face value. The $2 Federal Reserve Notes for sale here are actually quite common. Unless you come across a discontinued United States Note, you’re not going to make a profit off a $2 bill. In short, save your money.

Do you want to see Nicolas Cage’s face every night before you go to bed and every morning after you wake up? Then we have just the pillowcase for you! Believe it or not, there are actually a wide variety of Nic Cage cases available on Amazon. Some show off Cage’s hairy chest, while others depict him as a United States astronaut. One even reads, “See you in My Dreams.” Then again, if you sat through “The Wicker Man,” it’s more likely to give you nightmares. Nevertheless, if you just can’t get enough of old Nic, your bedspread won’t be complete without one of these bad boys. And remember, despite all his rage, he’s still just Nicholas Cage.

Although many write off the Roswell UFO incident as a hoax, some conspiracy theorists firmly believe that aliens really crash-landed on Earth in 1947. If you’re wondering where the evidence lies, look no further than Amazon.com. This soil sample was allegedly recovered from the crash site near Corona, New Mexico. If you’re still not convinced, it comes with a certificate of authenticity issued by Images SI Inc. That must mean it’s legit… right? Well, even if it’s bogus, we’re sure there are plenty of people out there that would love a bag of dirt for their birthday.

If you’re watching your diet, Haribo Sugar Free Gummy Bears might sound like a healthy alternative to the real deal. Before you start chowing down, though, you might want to check the warning label first. On the back of this five-pound bag, you’ll find a statement that clearly reads, “Consumption of some sugar-free candies may cause stomach discomfort and/or a laxative effect.” According to numerous reviews on Amazon, these colorful candies guarantee an explosive date with a toilet. One customer even claims that they’re used to punish uncooperative inmates in maximum-security prisons. Unless you’re desperate to empty your bowels or you’re looking to get revenge on someone, these Gummy Bears won’t have you bouncing here and there and everywhere.

Sharing a resemblance to Jabba the Hutt’s sail barge from “Return of the Jedi,” the JL421 Badonkadonk can be purchased on Amazon for roughly $20,000. This doesn’t even include shipping and handling, which will cost an additional several hundred dollars. You could buy a brand new car for less money than that! Assuming you have cash to burn, though, this battle tank can carry five people inside and travel up to 40 MPH. With plenty of extra space, an armored shell, and a PA system, the Donk is great for transporting cargo, declaring war, and exploring the desert in style. It’s definitely one for the eccentric buyer, but it’s also 1,100 pounds of sheer awesomeness!

#4: Neo Mag Light Tattoo Remover

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After a wild night of partying, you may wake up the next morning to realize you’ve made a huge mistake. For example, maybe you got a tattoo that just doesn’t suit you. Tattoo removal can be a lengthy and expensive process, which is why some consumers might be drawn to the Neo Mag Light. This item allows people to remove tattoos from the comfort of their home for a reasonable price. While this certainly sounds convenient on paper, many Amazon reviewers have argued that the product doesn’t work and burns like hell. As costly as those laser treatments are, you’re probably better off leaving this in the hands of trained professionals.

Harvesting wolf urine manually can be a dangerous and disgusting endeavor. Fortunately, you can always just buy a bottle of wolf pee on Amazon and save yourself the trouble. Seriously, we’re not making this up! Although it might seem like something you’d purchase at Spencer Gifts, wolf urine is supposedly good for getting rid of wild animals, such as deer, moose, and coyotes. Speaking of which, coyote urine can also be purchased on Amazon to keep unwanted pests away. Since wolves are higher up on the food chain, though, their urine seems to be the preferred repellant. A couple celebrities have even endorsed wolf pee, including Krysten Ritter and James Van Der Beek.

#2: 1,500 Live Ladybugs

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You can buy an assortment of live insects on Amazon, from ant farms to worm farms. Yet, this is easily the most bizarre bug collection up for sale. For just under 20 dollars, you can be the proud owner of not one, not two, but 1,500 ladybugs! Granted, ladybugs can come in handy if you want to protect your garden and houseplants from pesky aphids, but isn’t 1,500 kind of overkill? On top of that, various Amazon users have complained that some of the ladybugs died in transit. In a more positive review, however, one satisfied customer noted that the ladybugs are easy to train minions that’ll aid in dastardly plans. So… there’s that. Before we get to our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions: Nothing Obama Toilet Paper Underpants Dispenser

#1: 55 Gallons of Lube

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If you want to buy a gag gift for someone’s bachelor or bachelorette party, showing up with a sex stool is one thing. Bringing a 55-gallon drum of lube will really raise the roof, however. Costing between one and two thousand dollars, this massive container of lubricant is perfect for wrestling matches, epic pranks, and countless other R-rated shenanigans. Of course if you just want to stock up on enough lube to last a lifetime, this drum is sure to come in handy. Jeez, when did this list turn into fifty shades of wrong? Do you agree with our list? What’s the craziest thing you’ve bought on Amazon? For more outrageous Top 10s published everyday, be sure to subscribe to MsMojo.