Top 10 Anime You Will Regret Watching

Apparently, there’s an anime for everyone, even those that cling to the hope of watching some good ol’ Bible/Isekai hybrid with a useless female lead. Not even joking, this thing is a crazy-ass mess of heavenly proportions. All we know is that this random student discovers that she’s got God DNA and is destined to settle a war between the forces of good and Noah’s demonic twin…coincidentally also named Noah. You’ll be scratching you head all the way through this OVA to the point where you might end up digging into your skull. Fascinatingly awful doesn’t even begin to cover it.

Hey, just because there’s no Cloud, Squall or any of the other iconic cast from the actual games, doesn’t make this show any less worthy of carrying the Final Fantasy name. See, there’s a Chocobo! That totally legitimises it! Yeah…this series is a blatant a cash grab as you can get, trailing off the hype of the beloved franchise while offering nothing of substance. Hardcore fans will be driven to the edge due to the absence of the characters they’ve come to adore, while casual viewers will immediately be put off by how underwhelming everything is. Wouldn’t be surprised if those Chocobos were fakes as well…

Lost is certainly the right word. Lost plot. Lost scares. Lost interest. Definitely not the kind of thing you want to subject an audience to when trying to come across as spooky. With too many characters and too little time to explain anything, this would-be thriller didn’t so much entrance us with its scares as it did put us to sleep. By the time the actual hauntings started we still couldn’t tell who was who or why we should even care. They should have just saved time and focused on the plights of the bus driver. Dealing with that many asshole kids? Now that’s scary.

Marvel and anime? Together?! This is a dream come true for nerds everywhere. After all, Tony Stark and his endless parade of suits are practically a shounen trope unto themselves. However, unlike the X-Men anime which managed to at least nail the character of Wolverine, this little venture just falls flat. This version of Stark lacks the charm to balance his massive ego, the fight scenes pack nowhere near as much of a punch, all the while the story clumsily rolls forward. Not so much the Invincible Iron Man as a bucket of bolts that barely managed to squeak by.

Well, those are six hours of my life I’m never getting back. Every second drained into the abyss that is this show. It wouldn’t be so bad if the time was spent watching something moderately entertaining, but this? This was a void masquerading as a romcom! The lack progression here is staggering. The characters never move on, never change as people, never settle on a damn romance, and essentially remain at the starting line for the entire run, all the while spouting dialogue that sounds philosophical but in actuality doesn’t mean diddly.

For those of you that loved the darkness and unrepentant tragedy presented in Devilman Crybaby, do yourself a favour and avoid these scummy renditions of Go Nagai’s apocalyptic works. It’s not that we didn’t expect a lunatic named Violence Jack to cause some carnage, it’s just we wanted it to have some level of substance. The creators of these OVAs seemed to have confused purposeful shock value for random cannibalism, oodles of rape and way too many forms of impalement. Doesn’t make for a pleasant viewing experience.

It’s not often one gets to say this but; this would have worked so much better as a hentai. You’ve got a generic student being brought to a fantasy world that can only be saved if he knocks up various ladies. Don’t get any ideas though, there’s no actual nookie involved…just some magic mumbo jumbo, random nakedness and poof! Impregnation powers activate! What could have been a hilarious parody or something wholly naughty manages to fail in every regard. No matter what your motivation for watching this was, you will leave disappointed!

Fifty minutes of watching a teenage girl sleep. That’s it. Just…watching her sleep. For fifty minutes. You might be thinking if you just keep watching for just a little bit longer, something crazy will happen. Maybe it will turn into into a philosophical discussion on the nature of voyeurism. Perhaps an alien will burst out of her head and break into a jazz routine. Nah...you're just stuck watching an anime girl sleep for nearly an hour. Okay I think I’m done here.

If you manage to withstand the bombardment that is this anime’s explosion of art style, you’ll find that just beneath its blinding overuse of 3D lies a story that makes so little sense it hurts. Summoning supernatural weaponry by holding hands with someone? Surpassing God by becoming the ultimate beta-male? Creepily specific fanservice? And that’s to say nothing of the dizzying camerawork, woeful use of music and incoherent plotting. This truly is the chalice of awful. At least we’ll never see its kind again. What do you mean it’s got a sequel?

Arguably the worst movie to ever bear the Dragon Ball name, save for Evolution, this flick is not only a horrible example of storytelling, but it also drags the once proud name of Broly through the mud. Or…bio-goop in this case. Is it a comedy? Is it a brutal action-fest? We don’t know and neither does the movie, since it goes back and forth way too many times to hold onto any kind of consistency. It’s a blight on DBZ’s legacy, with the only saving grace being that it now sits firmly in the shadow of Dragon Ball Super: Broly.