The Perfect Spider-Man 2099 Movie

Spider-Man 2099 Movie Blueprint With great power, comes great responsibility… to make great Spider-Man movies of course. Lucky for us, we’ve gotten a lot of them over the years! Well, minus an Andrew Garfield here, and an Emo Peter Parker there… Yep, people just can’t seem to get enough of that friendly neighbourhood web slinger on the big screen! Which begs the question – why have they not taken a swing at adapting perhaps the most enigmatic version of Spider-Man out there? No, not Spider-Ham (although) – I’m talking about Spider-Man 2099! Now, I assume it’s only a matter a time before the wall crawler of the future spins his way into cinemas, but who’s to say they get it right, when they so often get it wrong? I’m “Mr. Hollywood” Matt Demers – professional film critic and all around pop culture aficionado – and today I’m joining WatchMojo to deliver the ultimate Spider-Man 2099 live action movie BLUEPRINT! THE CAST It’s safe to say that no other aspect of a movie gets people as excited, or riled up, as the casting! Just ask that Batman guy… Now in this story, set in the far off future of Earth-928, the Spider-Man mantle is taken up by Miguel O’Hara, a geneticist who, after a sabotaged experiment, ends up with 50% spider DNA. Uhh, gross. Given he’s our titular hero and all, Miguel is no doubt the most important role of the movie. And while there are lots of factors that need to be considered for this particular casting, it’s important that whoever it is fully represents the character’s hispanic heritage - no Hollywood whitewashing here folks! With that in mind, there are more than a few actors I could see tackle the part with gumption - one being J. D. Pardo, star of the Sons Of Anarchy spin-off Mayans MC (and all around cool guy). But while Pardo definitely has the physicality down, lets face it; his rough-em-up biker persona doesn’t make for a very convincing geneticist! If we are going strictly on looks, then singer / actor Diego Boneta more than fits the bill… but he lacks a certain action-star presence. Maybe if Miguel was a rock star… And yes, while I can certainly hear your cries for Teen Wolf heartthrob Tyler Posey, I ultimately reject them in favour of: David Castañeda. Fans of Netflix’s Umbrella Academy already know why David is the ideal choice: he’s charismatic, endearing, more than a little rebellious, and has a cunning street-smart side to him. There’s no doubt in my mind that with Castaneda in the suit, Spider-Man 2099 would be the bad-ass hero of the future we need him to be! Now onto the love interest of the story, or in this case – the wife. Yep, in Spider-Man 2099, Miguel O’Hara is actually married to his childhood best friend, Xina Kwan. Also given the gift of intellect, Xina is way smart, loving, and always encouraging of Miguel. You know what they say: behind every great man, is a great woman. And while there are lots of great choices for Xina, the likes of Constance Wu and Lyrica Okano, there’s perhaps no one greater for this role than: Christine Ko Best known for her turns on the CBS sitcom The Great Indoors and Hawaii Five-O, Christine brings a great deal to each part she tackles, be it a sweet sensibility or a certain measured control, and there is no doubt she would do the same as “Mrs. Spider-Man 2099.” But, what about the other woman in Miguel’s life? You know, his holographic assistant Lyla – or “LYrate Lifeform Approximation.” Yeah - that one! Well, given Lyla is artificial intelligence, there’s no need to be held to the whole “the actor must look exactly like the character” argument. After all, Lyla’s voice matters the most here, and it’s up to those magical special FX wizards to create the Marilyn Monroe inspired rest. So, just who in Hollywood has got the vocal chops to make Lyla a true standout? Why, none other than one of the most uniquely sounding stars there is: Rhianna With a voice that is soft and warm, but strong and assertive when it needs to be, Rhianna would give Lyla a super fun edge, making her a surefire crowd-pleaser every time she appears with a message for our hero. Bonus points if on one occasion she reminds Miguel to bring his umbrella. And finally, what would a movie be without its “big bad?!” For this instance, the best villain for the job is Kron Stone! Kron factors into Miguel’s personal life (shhhh- he’s his secret half brother), and he also finds himself tangled up in the usual bad guy stuff… you know, like mass killings and so forth. Oh yeah, I should probably mention he’s the Venom of the future! So, with LOTS to be brought to the table, there are a few Hollywood heavyweights that could no doubt “murder” the role: Luke Evans has proved to be a more than capable bully in Disney’s live action Beauty and the Beast. Wes Bentley has made a career out of being subtly creepy. And James Marsden has no doubt nailed the “love to hate him thing” at this point. BUT my pick, described as the “best dang actor of his generation” by Vanity Fair, would give Kron the depth and intensity the character so badly needs: why it’s Oscar Isaac! Plus, this would serve as a highly deserved do-over for his first foray as a comic book baddie in the much-maligned X-Men Apocalypse. Let’s just blame that one on the makeup and call it a day. THE DIRECTOR So given this series is set in the far future and is described by many as “Bladerunner-esque,” one would think the directors of those films, Ridley Scott and Dennis Viellneuve respectively, would be the best choices. I say not so fast. While Scott and Villeneuve would nail the futuristic visuals and complexity of the story, they wouldn’t necessarily be able to deliver the proper kinetic action needed for it. This is a superhero film after all, and it should be nothing short of a fast moving blitzkrieg of fun – emphasis on the fun! And while I’ll admit that I’d be wholly interested to see what the Duffer Brothers would do with this property, given their genius approach to storytelling and science fiction adventure on Netflix’s Stranger Things, I think this movie needs someone at the helm that has experience in ALL the genres a film like this would mash together. That’s why my top choice for director is: Mr. Brad Bird Trust me, there isn’t a director going today more suited for a Spider-Man 2099 film than Bird. Not convinced? Well let’s see, has he done: Superhero movies? Check Blockbuster action? Check Futuristic fantasy? Check Sci-Fi adventure? Check Ok, now picture all those genres rolled into one, and tell me Bird wouldn’t deliver a tremendously entertaining “Spider-Man 2099” with style and substance to match? You can’t – because he would! ‘Nuff said. THE PLOT While Peter Parker’s Spider-Man is a household name and UBER popular even amongst the most general public, this Spider-Man of the future is, well, not. So, as much as “origin story” can sometimes be dirty words in superhero movie circles, it’s kinda necessary here. This film needs to tell Miguel’s story right – make the audience care – not just hotshot it to get him in the costume sooner. We, the audience, deserve the fully fleshed out tale of how Miguel’s time working at Alchemax turned deadly and ultimately led his DNA to be re-written with a spider's genetic code. Again, gross. And with so much depth to Miguel’s storied beginnings, flashbacks to when he was a kid with Xina and Kron would certainly go a long way in setting the stage for the “present day” in the film. Here, we’d get to see just how Miguel’s conflict with his bullying half-brother reached its boiling point, and why the stakes are so darn high when their inevitable showdown turns into a futuristic throw-down for the ages! And sure, while there are lots of cool stories that pluck Miguel out of the year 2099 and have him “fight crime in the present time,” it’s best this first movie stays in the world of Earth-928. Just think of all the things the writers can play with in a future landscape populated by superheroes and villains and all that’s come before it? So let’s leave the time travel stuff for the sequels… but alas, those are blueprints for another day. And there you go!