Top 10 Things Only Adults Get in the Hocus Pocus Franchise
#10: The Gaping Gaps in the Sanderson's Understanding of the Modern Age “Hocus Pocus” (1993)
Early in the first movie, the Sanderson sisters stand trial and meet a gruesome end for their crimes. Then, Max accidentally resurrects them 300 years later. Needless to say, a lot had changed in the world, so it makes perfect sense that the sisters find things like modern transportation, paved streets and headlights baffling. However, for people who haven’t been around for three centuries, they also appear to have an impressive grasp of the contemporary age. There’s talk about cooking with margarine, they’re familiar with "Screamin' Jay" Hawkins’ most famous single from 1956 - and how on earth does Mary know how to ride a vacuum? We’re no history experts, but we’re pretty sure none of those items existed in 1693.
#9: Whatever Happened to Jay & Ice? “Hocus Pocus” (1993)
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Remember Jay and Ice? The mean guys who steal Max’s shoes? Well, at least someone does! When Max and Allison set out to rescue Dani, they discover that the Sanderson sisters have the pair locked in cages. Rather than do the right thing and free them, Max takes back his stolen possessions and literally leaves them hanging. Later, during the end credits, we see them engage in a little sing-a-long to pass the time. We don’t condone theft, but couldn’t Max have saved them too? Is stealing shoes really a life-sentence offense? They’re briefly mentioned in the sequel, but we still have no idea if they were freed or even survived. Seriously, in all of Salem, no one noticed they were missing?
#8: What Exactly Do the Sisters Feed On? “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022)
As fans of the original movie know, the Sanderson sisters’ whole ‘thing’ is feeding off children’s souls. This is why the Walgreens scene in the sequel might’ve confused some older viewers. Becca and Izzy trick the witches into believing that the store’s skincare aisle has all their child-feasting needs, including an apparently delicious “babyface” cream. The bit takes a macabre turn when Mary holds up a face mask she believes to be a child’s face and starts munching on it. A kid might find this morbidly humorous, and sure, we chuckled too. But we also wondered, since when do these witches eat flesh? It evoked the spine-chilling feeling we had the first time we watched the terrible trio get ready to feast.
#7: Betrothed at 16 “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022)
During the flashback scene at the start of the sequel, Winifred tells her sisters that Reverend Traske is marrying her off at the ripe old age of 16. Yes, you heard us correctly: 16. We all had warped ideas about age as children, so this probably didn’t seem too bizarre to the youngest audiences. However, many teen and adult viewers likely got the sweats just by the idea of getting married so young. Still, as the history buffs among us might point out, the life expectancy in 17th century United States was between 41-43, compared to today, which averages around the late 70s. It might sound terrifying, but the math checks out! You just know Winifred would be a total Bridezilla.
#6: “We Desire Children” “Hocus Pocus” (1993)
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In the first film, the witches learn all about this magical contraption called a bus. Though he’s clearly beguiled by his bewitching passenger, the driver’s description of his job still doesn’t remind us of any bus ride we’ve ever taken. Still, when Winifred tells him their "most forbidden desires," he fires back with a racy quip that definitely went over our heads as kids. As the ladies prepare to disembark, the driver's parting conversation with Sarah Sanderson shows that he's ready and willing to make true to his earlier promise. It took us more re-watches than we care to admit to finally cotton on to the joke, and we're probably not the only ones.
#5: The Sanderson Drag Queens “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022)
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You know you’ve made it somewhere in the world in 2022 when there’s a drag tribute act in your honor. Indeed, “Hocus Pocus” has vastly influenced the drag community for years. Still, nothing gave us a thrill like seeing “Drag Race” alumni Ginger Minj, Kahmora Hall, and Kornbread Jeté cameo as the Sanderson sisters' drag act in the sequel. The movie had a significant impact on the LGBTQ+ community, while its leading witches are known advocates for causes supporting their rights and acceptance. The inclusion of this trio was so much more than just a fun cameo; it was a nod to the community’s loyalty and a warm “we see you” to their most devoted fans.
#4: Cat Got Your Tongue, Binx? “Hocus Pocus” (1993)
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As we know, in a former life, Thackery Binx was a human who failed to save his sister from the Sanderson sisters. They sentenced him to life as a cursed cat who ends up stranded when even his father shoos him away. For 300 years, Binx couldn’t communicate his plight to anyone; he even resorts to drastic actions when trying to stop Max from igniting the candle. Yet, next thing we know, Binx can talk? We were no strangers to talking black cats in the 90s, so we barely batted an eyelid. However, now we’re wondering how he could suddenly speak to Max, Allison, and Dani. Was it something to do with the candle’s magic? Frustratingly, an explanation was never offered.
#3: So Many Easter Eggs “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022)
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One of the best parts of a long-awaited sequel is the inevitable and exciting Easter egg hunt, and “Hocus Pocus 2” did not disappoint. Since we’ve already listed our top 10 callbacks in another video, we’ll just pinpoint some of our favorites here. When the Sandersons first receive the spellbook, Winifred first casts her eye on a cat transformation spell. Later, the witches peer through a window where a couple seems to be watching something closely resembling the 1993 cult classic. There’s also a blink-and-you’ll-miss-it nod to the iconic Madonna costume that Max and Dani’s mom wears. Newer fans will likely miss many of these details. But we eagle-eyed devotees to the 1993 original watched intently for Easter eggs at every turn.
#2: Billy’s Sleepless 29 Years “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022)
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We were delighted to learn that friendly zombie Billy Butcherson was being resurrected for the sequel. But our delight soon turned to horror when we discovered how he'd spent the last 29 years. In the movie, Gilbert is sent to the cemetery to dig up Butcherson and shockingly discovers that Billy's resting place is shallower than he expected - and he’s very much awake. Yup, poor Billy’s been awake for almost three decades. So, essentially he spent all that time helplessly trapped underground while people unknowingly trod across his grave just a few feet above. The imagery's so disturbing that just thinking about it gives us palpitations. We need to move on before these mental images give us nightmares. Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions. A Curse for the Vegans, “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022) That’s Quite a Vegan Feast She’s Listing There Who the Devil Is That?, “Hocus Pocus” (1993) Do Kids Today Recognize Filmmaker / Actor Garry Marshall and/or His Sister Penny? The Morbid Photoshoot, “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022) We Doubt Many So-Called Witches Stopped & Smiled for a Picture as Their Fate Loomed Closer The “Veep” Reunion, “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022) Kathy Najimy, Sam Richardson & Tony Hale All Appeared on the Satirical Political TV Show The Salem Witch Trials Actually Ended Before Halloween of 1693, “Hocus Pocus” (1993) Maybe They Made an Exception for This Truly Terrible Trio?
#1: The Whole Virgin Motif “Hocus Pocus” (1993) & “Hocus Pocus 2” (2022)
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It's hard to imagine Disney explicitly addressing a character's sexual activity, or lack of it, let alone using it as the catalyst for a film's storyline. In 1993, Max's virginity was key to the plot and likely elicited plenty of impromptu birds and the bees talks. It was a recurring punchline that suggested virginity was something to be embarrassed about. The 2022 sequel continues the joke, from the curious kid in Gilbert's audience to the nudge-nudge-wink-wink explanation of why the store owner can't light the candle. As young'uns, we probably didn't really understand much about the whole virginity thing. But now we're wondering why a film aimed at children is so fixated on this social construct? It really is perpl-hex-ing.
