Top 10 Ghostbusters Ghosts
#10: Zombie Taxi Driver
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“Ghostbusters” (1984) On a hazy summer afternoon in New York City, a snooty businessman hurriedly steps into a cab and buckles up for a bone-chilling scare! Because, little did he know, there was magic in the air that day. The Ghostbusters’ ecto-containment unit exploded, setting loose an army of diabolical ghosts that are rampaging through the city. The taxi driver is revealed to be a creepy skeletal apparition who drives like a total lunatic! This fossil-fueled phantom must’ve driven New Yorkers crazy, but it’s only fair for a cabbie who’s revving up for the coming of Gozer. The taxi driver ghost may only appear on screen for a moment, but his crazed, rotting visage is the stuff of nightmares.
#9: Pappy Sargassi
“Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) In 1991, the Ghostbusters returned to the Sedgewick Hotel to catch a few more loose spooks. But one of those spooks was hellbent on catching the Ghostbusters by hook or by crook. Pappy Sargassi was a salty old fisherman who shellfishly turned the various areas of the hotel into a haunted, watery maze. He becomes a major haddock for the reeled Ghostbusters, as he lures them deeper and deeper into the barnacled hotel. The Ghostbusters may flounder in their first attempts to catch him, but they put an end to his coral when they trap Sargassi in the dining room. The Ghostbusters catch the crabby fisherman in a pinch and make their clams for the night. Pappy Sargassi was certainly the Ghostbusters’ deadliest catch.
#8: The Scoleri Brothers
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“Ghostbusters II” (1989) In 1989, spiritual turbulence was brewing beneath New York City. The Ghostbusters were ready to kick some slime, but no one was ready to believe them. Luckily, Tony and Nunzio Scoleri shocked the courtroom by exploding out of a jar of psychomagnotheric ectoplasm. These ghastly gangsters weren’t too happy about their death sentence from the Judge, but they’re certainly having a blast now! The Scoleri Brothers begin tearing up the courtroom and causing all kinds of mischief and electric mayhem. That’s the Ghostbusters’ cue to fire up their proton packs and jump into action. The Scoleri brothers put up a pretty good fight, but ultimately they’re too slow for the Ghostbusters. Game over, Super Scoleri Bros.
#7: Dream Ghost
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“Ghostbusters” (1984) Everybody’s heard ghost stories around the campfire, but in case you were confused about what was happening in this scene… a mysterious, beautiful lady appears in Ray’s dream. Steeped in a sensual aura, she hovers above Ray, beckoning him with her hungry, voluptuous gaze to indulge her deepest desires. So here’s what we like to think was happening: you see… earlier in the film, Ray was snacking on Cheez-its. And it just so happens that the Dream Ghost loves Cheez-its! It’s practically her favorite food. Ray happened to have a handful of Cheez-its in his pocket when he went to bed; so the Dream Ghost was just trying to unbuckle his pants so she could get the Cheez-its from his pocket without waking him up. Yep… that’s what we’re going with.
#6: Spider Witch
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“Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) The Spider Witch was a pretty, pesky poltergeist who haunted the Sedgewick Hotel. In the 1920s, she became a Gozer worshipper who took pleasure in seducing unsuspecting men back to her room. Her victims were found dead, “hung from the ceiling,” and “drained of blood.” She’s half-human, half-spider, and she controls an army of skittery spider minions. Sound scary? No worries… just leave it to Egon Spengler to straighten out this slinky spider! In 1991, Egon and the rookie ghostbuster went up to the hotel’s 12th floor and discovered her secret lair. Then they showed that witch how they do things downtown. She was a fearsome foe, but a spider is no match for a Spengler!
#5: Terror Dogs
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“Ghostbusters” (1984) Not to be confused with North American black bears or cougars, Terror dogs are a dreaded species of demonic hellhound, most commonly associated with the ancient Sumerian deity, known by names like Volguus Zildrohar, Lord of the Sebouillia and of course, Gozer. Terror dogs are notable for their fiendish and frightening attributes: sharp fangs, claws, glowing red eyes, and a terrifying roar. Should you ever find yourself cornered by a Terror dog, offering a milkbone is not likely to sway their diabolical desire to possess you. They’re known to manifest themselves in bizarre places, including, but not limited to, art deco apartments and major household appliances. Two of the most notable Terror dogs were Vinz Clortho and Zuul, the Keymaster and the Gatekeeper of Gozer, respectively.
#4: Vigo
“Ghostbusters II” (1989) & “Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) As the Ghostbusters discovered the secret of the pink ooze, it led them straight to a creepy, mysterious painting of Vigo the Carpathian. Vigo was an evil tyrant and sorcerer from the 1500s who became known as the Scourge of Carpathia. Vigo was despised and put to death by a rebellion of his own subjects. His vengeful spirit lay dormant within the painting for centuries. When he returned, he vowed to reclaim his throne of blood upon a mountain of skulls. In hindsight, it does seem as though Vigo might’ve overreacted to losing a kitten over 400 years ago. Nevertheless, Vigo was one of the slimiest, scariest villains the Ghostbusters ever battled. Good vibes and proton packs always win the day!
#3: Library Ghost
“Ghostbusters” (1984) & “Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) Don’t let this quiet, little old librarian fool you. At first glance, Eleanor Twitty may appear bookish and reserved, but her spooky circulation will send books flying off shelves. Eleanor was the very first free-floating full-torso vaporous apparition encountered by the Ghostbusters. As she was peacefully page-turning in her grave, her well read spirit spiked Egon’s PKE meter. Eager to catch their first ghost, the Ghostbusters tried to get her, but she instantly transmogrified into a hideous monster! She scares the socks off the poor Ghostbusters and sends them booking for the exit. A few years later, she sshhed them again when they returned to the library. It was bound to happen.
#2: Slimer
“Ghostbusters” (1984), “Ghostbusters II” (1989) & “Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) Slimer is what the Ghostbusters refer to as a “focused non-terminal repeating phantasm, or a Class 5 full-roaming vapor.” Slimer is known for his voracious appetite, eating almost anything he can get his ectoplasmic mitts on. He often haunted the Sedgewick Hotel, making a fine mess of fine wines and fancy foods. But he’s not a picky eater. Sometimes a whole cart of hot dogs is better than steak at the Sedgewick. If you accidentally leave your lunch out, Slimer’s the bus boy who’ll be cleanin’ up your plate. You may not stand for it, but the flowers will.* What makes Slimer so much ecto-cooler than most other ghosts? Cause he’s mean, green and on the screen! Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions. Mink Coat, “Ghostbusters II” (1989) A Rich Lady’s Coat Gets Its Furry Vengeance Ghost Train (Spectral Locomotive), “Ghostbusters II” (1989) A Spectral Locomotive That Rockets Past Wiiiiiinstooon RMS Titanic, “Ghostbusters II” (1989) The Famous Ship Makes Its Long Overdue Arrival on New Year’s Eve Book Golem, “Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) A Literary Monster That Literally Wants the Ghostbusters Buried in Good Books
#1: Stay Puft Marshmallow Man
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“Ghostbusters” (1984) & “Ghostbusters: The Video Game” (2009) He's a sailor; in New York… he’s the 100 ft. puffy, white menace who’s here to destroy the world! This doom-bringing, confectionary pastiche of Godzilla won’t be found anywhere in Spates Catalog or Tobin's Spirit Guide. The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man is the 1984 destructor form of Gozer. This jolly destructor form was inadvertently chosen by Ray Stantz. Needless to say, it was a radical and sugary deviation from Gozer’s previous destructor form chosen by the last of the Meketrex supplicants. Somehow, Stay Puft is just terrifying and funny at the same time. The Ghostbusters saw s’more of Mr. Stay Puft when he attacked Times Square in 1991, but they toasted him that time too. Just like Egon says…
