Top 10 Christmas Movies That Aged Poorly
#10: “Grumpy Cat’s Worst Christmas Ever” (2014)
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Basing a movie on a meme is not usually the best recipe for longevity, but that didn’t stop the Lifetime Channel back in 2014. So what if it had already been two years since Grumpy Cat went viral? She was still a marketable commodity. However, the further away we move from the sensation that was Grumpy Cat, the harder it is to understand why anyone would make a movie with a talking cat that doesn’t move its mouth. The cast try their best to act opposite the fractious feline, but they’re not getting much back. The trademark grumpy expression still raises a smile from time to time, but after ninety two minutes the joke has worn thin.
#9: “Trading Places” (1983)
The classic Eddie Murphy comedy “Trading Places” is beloved by many, but if you’re sitting down to watch it for the first time since the eighties, you might get a few nasty surprises. Once applauded for its sharp social commentary, the movie’s message is now less striking than the abundance of sexism and stereotypes that the viewer meets at every turn. Dan Aykroyd in blackface, affecting a dodgy Jamaican accent, is just the beginning. There’s also plenty of gratuitous nudity, a smattering of offensive language and a villain condemned to an eternity of being violated by a gorilla. Oh, the hilarity.
#8: “Bad Santa” (2003)
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This dark-comedy was always intended to provoke, but modern audiences aren’t so easy to shock. While “Bad Santa” did critically and financially well initially, many are left with a feeling of mild disgust and not enough laughs to make up for it upon rewatching. Billy Bob Thornton’s department store Santa spews slurs with the worst of them, covering all bases from misogyny to homophobia. According to the writers, executive producers the Coen Brothers drew the line at Down syndrome wisecracks, cutting several from the movie, but that seems to have been their only stipulation. A misguided sequel followed in 2016, which left us in no doubt that “Bad Santa” should be left in the past.
#7: “Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer” (1964)
Stop-motion TV special “Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer” has been broadcast annually since 1964, but it’s been surrounded by controversy in the late 2010s. Tongue-in-cheek criticism of the Christmas classic has drawn attention to the bigotry and misbehavior of certain characters. Fans on social media have also highlighted a problematic theme: that Rudolph has to prove his worth before being accepted for his difference. Nostalgia and fond memories have kept it alive, but it would be very different if made today. It may be lovely, but it’s a lovely piece of the past.
#6: “Love Actually” (2003)
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Richard Curtis is in his element when depicting the slice of life that he knows best - that of middle-class, straight, white Brits living in London. However, “Love Actually” is an ensemble piece, so there’s no excuse for the lack of diversity - even Richard Curtis saysit makes him feel “a bit stupid.” Surprisingly, two additional storylines, one featuring a lesbian couple, another following an African family, were actually cut from the final film. The storylines that stayed don’t hold up particularly well either. What’s more, the fat jokes aimed at Natalie and the scene with the American girls are both a bit uncomfortable in hindsight. Andrew Lincoln’s character has also been re-evaluated, and as general consensus has it, the card scene is more creepy than romantic.
#5: “Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” (2000)
Based on a novelty Christmas song from 1979, “ Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer” has everything you could possibly want from a quirky animated movie. There’s a sweet old lady protagonist, a quaint, small-town setting and some catchy songs. Also the issues from a violent sleigh accident, Santa on trial and the CEO of a greedy corporation, are all resolved by the end. The messaging is all over the place, the storyline is contrived and the animation belongs firmly in 2000 - although it didn’t look great even then. The eponymous song was already irrelevant when the movie was made, and now that it’s all but forgotten, the existence of the film seems more unbelievable than ever.
#4: “The Santa Clause 2” (2002)
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The first “Santa Clause” movie stars Tim Allen as a divorced dad who takes on the role of Santa after the real thing disappears. The sequel had to magic up a story from somewhere, but was it really necessary to marry off the protagonist? The idea that Santa needs his Mrs. Claus to have a happy and fulfilled life is kind of old fashioned and feels more dated as the years go by. The couple have only been on a few dates before he’s rushing her to the altar and whisking her off to the North Pole. Also, ‘marry me or you’ll ruin Christmas for all the world’s children’ is not the most romantic proposal. That’s a guilt trip if ever we heard one.
#3: “Holiday Inn” (1942)
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As we know from “Trading Places”, blackface was still popping up in movies into the late 20th Century, although by the 1950s, it was already a controversial issue. When “White Christmas” was released in 1954, it featured a number all about minstrel shows, but there were no painted faces, only nostalgia. The movie’s predecessor, however, had no such qualms. Compared to “White Christmas”, “Holiday Inn” is very rarely shown around Christmas time - or at least its original version almost never is. This may have something to do with the infamous “Abraham” scene. Bing Crosby takes to the stage, dressed as Abraham Lincoln complete with mutton-chops and for some indecipherable reason, in full makeup caricaturing a Black person. To make things worse, the band behind him is too. It’s not an easy watch.
#2: “Jingle All the Way” (1996)
Although the critics were always scornful, producer Chris Columbus’s holiday comedy “Jingle All the Way” was a hit with viewers, topping the box office back in the nineties. Looking back though, it’s hard to work out exactly what we liked about it. The story is a satirical fable about the commercialisation of Christmas, which plays out with all the subtlety of a high energy sitcom. Arnold Schwarzenegger has decent comic timing and throws himself into the chaos, but it has to be said that this movie gets worse with every re-watch. The use of a bomb threat, played for comedy, feels especially out of place in today’s world.
#1: “The Polar Express” (2004)
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New animation technology is a double edged sword. While it’s still brand new, it gives the viewer a fresh and exciting visual experience. The downside is, it dates much faster than a live-action movie, faster than even traditional hand-drawn animation sometimes. “The Polar Express” was ground-breaking upon its release, praised for its use of motion capture technology combined with CGI animation and live action. The technique didn’t catch on though, and watching back almost two decades on, the animation style is much creepier than we remember. Tom Hanks’ kindly conductor has a glazed and sinister expression and the kids aren’t much better. “The Polar Express” may be a modern classic, but it’s also undeniably weird looking.
