Top 10 Celebrities Who Need to Stop Telling Us Things
#10: The Kardashians
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This family has been inescapable for over a decade-and-a-half. Love or hate them, keeping up with their unfiltered shenanigans can be exhausting. Considering that a sex tape helped put her on the map, it’s not surprising that Kim Kardashian would announce to the world that she and ex-husband Kanye West were having intercourse “500 times a day” when they were married. However, we could’ve done without knowing that she did it with Pete Davidson in front of a fireplace to “honor” her grandma. The same goes for Kourtney’s public exploits with Travis Baker and how Khloé used to do it daily with Lamar Odom. Even Kim acknowledged that she sometimes shares too much, saying that “it can be a little bit dangerous at times.”
#9: Meghan Trainor
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Some connect with Meghan Trainor’s music while others find her songs antifeminist. One thing that we can all agree on is that Trainor doesn’t hold back. Marrying Daryl Sabara in 2018, Trainor described her sex life as a “nightmare.” Not for the reason you might think, however. Let’s just say, it’s a “big” issue, not a “small” one. If you want to erase that information from your mind, focus on the couple’s adjoining toilets. Apparently, they go
#1 together a lot, but
#2 is a rarity. Trainor also goes into great detail on her pregnancy in “Dear Future Mama,” which is literally described as a “TMI Guide.” At least Sabara is self-aware, but we’ll never look at Juni from “Spy Kids” the same way again.
#8: Jake Gyllenhaal
Even when a celebrity shares too much, we understand why the public would be fascinated by their sex life. Their shower life, though? When asked about his shower ritual in a Vanity Fair interview, Jake Gyllenhaal said, “More and more I find bathing to be less necessary, at times.” The Oscar-nominated actor elaborated, “I do also think that there’s a whole world of not bathing that is also really helpful for skin maintenance, and we naturally clean ourselves.” With Gyllenhaal being so open about bathing, it shouldn’t come as a shock that he’s equally frank about circumcision. Talking about his childhood friendship with Amy Schumer’s husband Chris Fischer, Gyllenhaal revealed that Chris was the only circumcised one in their group, mystifying him as a kid.
#7: Sean Penn
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No doubt that Sean Penn is a phenomenal actor, but we’re not sure we’d invite him to a dinner party. Why? Because there’s bound to be something going on in the world and Penn is definitely going to have more than a few words (whether we asked his opinion or not). Even if you agree with what he’s saying, Penn has a tendency to go overboard. For example, most would agree with Penn that Will Smith was at “his worst” when he slapped Chris Rock at the Oscars. However, Penn lost us when he suggested that Smith wouldn’t have engaged in violence if Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelensky had been there. Sean, we know that you can’t help yourself, but maybe dial it back like 70%.
#6: Ashton Kutcher & Mila Kunis
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Amid Danny Masterson’s downfall, many were curious what his former “That '70s Show” co-stars had to say. People were especially inquisitive after Kunis and Kutcher wrote letters defending Masterson. It didn’t help when the couple released a video saying that they were “aware of the pain” their letters caused. If you’re not gonna give a real apology, just don’t say anything. It also wouldn’t hurt to take a break from social media - or at least think before you tweet. This was especially apparent when Kutcher tweeted that September 11, 2011 was the “greatest day of the year” due to the NFL opening season. That went over about as well as when Kutcher questioned Penn State coach Joe Paterno’s firing without doing any research.
#5: Charlie Puth
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Being part of the YouTube generation, singer Charlie Puth has grown up in a culture that encourages people to share their lives online. So, when do we finally say, “That’s too much, man?” Maybe when Puth revealed that he prefers to turn down the music while getting intimate… with one exception during his alone time. Puth shared in a Bustle interview that “This Love” by Maroon 5 is his jam… his Charlie jam. After becoming good friends with Adam Levine, Puth told him about his guilty pleasure. Levine’s response? “That’s really weird.” We’re thinking the same thing, Adam. Although Puth doesn’t like listening to music during “the act,” he once wrote a song mid-intercourse, recording a voice note before getting back to it.
#4: Chrissy Teigen & John Legend
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For a period, we couldn’t get enough of Chrissy Teigen and John Legend. The more we saw on social media, though, we wished that we knew less. Teigen has made it no secret that she and Legend aren’t afraid to “get frisky” in - let’s say unconventional - places. Be it under a blanket on a plane to Thailand or in the bathroom at the Democratic National Convention in 2008, they’re open to just about anything… except “doggy style.” We’d say, “Don’t ask why,” but Teigen already told the world. Honestly, this is all fairly innocent compared to some of the hurtful statements that Teigen made online, although that’s a whole other can of worms. The bottom line: less is more… sometimes a lot more.
#3: Gwyneth Paltrow
Making fun of Gwyneth Paltrow is an internet pastime. Even Paltrow is basically in on the joke. That said, when did the discourse commence? Some would argue when she stated, “I’d rather smoke crack than eat cheese from a tin,” but we can go back even further. Remember the time she said, “I would rather die than let my kid eat Cup-a-Soup.” Patrow is like that rich, completely oblivious frienemy who never misses an opportunity to remind people how inferior they are to her. But she always does it with that irresistible grin! As Paltrow said in 2009, “I am who I am. I can’t pretend to be somebody who makes $25,000 a year.” Can you at least watch what you share via Goop?
#2: Dax Shepard & Kristen Bell
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As hilarious as this couple can be when they get real, their brutal honesty has also led to some pretty awkward revelations. Whether it’s Bell telling the world that she once had her husband nurse from her breasts due to Mastitis or Shepard explaining why he got a vasectomy, it feels like we know this couple in intimate, occasionally uncomfortable ways. In case you were wondering, the whole swingers rumor is precisely that: a rumor. However, it apparently stemmed from a joke Shepard repeatedly made to party and podcast guests, telling them to leave their keys. Bell expressed frustration that so many people take jokes literally. We sympathize with that, but these two share so much that it’s hard to tell when they’re joking.
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few less-than-honorable mentions.
Lena Dunham
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John Mayer
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David Zaslav
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Millie Bobby Brown
Nobody Really Knows That They’re a Feminist Until a Psychic Tells Them So
Lea Michele
It’s Rachel Berry, Need We Say More?
#1: Will & Jada Pinkett Smith
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For the longest time, Will and Jada seemed like the ideal celebrity couple. The illusion started to shatter when Jada confirmed that she had an “entanglement” with August Alsina and Will… well, you watched the 2022 Oscars… or at least that clip. With all of this out in the open, you’d think these two would take a step back from talking about their personal lives. Instead, Jada doubled down, sharing in her 2023 memoir that she had been separated from Will since 2016 and that infamous Oscar Night brought them closer. You know, we came recently across a Vogue article with the headline, “We Officially Know Too Much About Will and Jada Pinkett Smith—But We’ve Also Asked for It.” Now, we’re asking to know less.
Which celebs do you think share too much? Let us know in the comments.
