Ranking the Monsters from Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark

“The Red Spot” So… how bad is your arachnophobia? If you’re terrified of all things eight-legged, you might disagree with us putting these creepy-crawlers at the bottom of our list. For the record, we think this scene was absolutely horrifying and very effective - it’s sure to get under your skin. But after making their explosive entrance, the spiders themselves weren’t actually that scary apart from the sheer number of them. They were also the first and only threat to be defeated with relative ease, for which we have to dock them some points. That being said, we think that the way the spiders were used was fantastic. Not only did they tap into the common fear of arachnophobia, but by placing them in the ever-growing bump on Ruth’s face, it also played on delusional parasitosis, the erroneous belief that one’s body has become infested with living creatures.

The Jangly Man

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“Me Tie Dough-ty Walker” To be completely transparent, we had a lot of trouble choosing where to rank this particular monster. While one can see his potential, we don’t think he was flawlessly executed. From one moment to the next, the character repeatedly goes from being arguably the most effective monster in the film, to its most disappointing. When his head first comes tumbling down the chimney, it makes for a great scare. And from his strength and speed to the unnatural way he manipulates his body, the physicality of the Jangly Man also works in his favor; contortionist Troy James deserves special credit for keeping the unnatural movement grounded in reality with his performance. Unfortunately, because the narrative action demands that the Jangly Man be front and center so long, we get far too much face-time with him. As we grow accustomed to his presence (and begin to notice the CGI) he loses his ability to induce fear.

The Toe Monster

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“The Big Toe” In all the ways that the Jangly Man falters, the Toe Monster triumphs. This tall, emaciated undead creature of the night admittedly doesn’t get all that much screen time, but she sure knows how to make an impression in the time she’s given! Well, that’s one way to ruin a stew. A masterpiece of practical effects with just enough minor CGI touches to hide the fact that she’s played by a male actor in a suit, the Toe Monster is something straight out of your worst zombie nightmare. As effective as the the Toe Monster is when she appears on screen, what really makes this ghoul so terrifying is the time she spends out of frame. Hiding under the bed is a common horror trope, but this scene reminds us that when properly executed - and with the right monster- it still works magic.

“Harold” Well… we’ll never watch “The Wizard of Oz” again! At least not the scenes that feature the scarecrow, that is. Harold is easily one of the most popular stories to ever appear in Alvin Schwartz’s books -the source material from which the film is inspired. As such, Øvredal and del Toro were taking a high stakes risk including the famous scarecrow in the film. Thankfully, they pulled it off perfectly. Never has the world seen an uglier or more terrifying scarecrow - he fills the audience with dread long before he actually comes to life. Harold really isn’t mobile for all that long, but the tension is so expertly built up that by the time he does make his move, the audience is already feeling incredibly anxious. Of course, the aftereffect of Harold’s attack only adds to the effectiveness of his supernatural menace.

The Pale Lady

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“The Pale Lady” Fear is a curious thing. On paper, a slow-moving womanlike figure with a giant smile doesn’t sound like the most terrifying of horror movie monsters. But if the paper in question is one of the illustrated pages from the original books, well… that’s a different story. In the source material, though terrifying in appearance, the Pale Lady of “The Dream” story actually shows up to warn the protagonist of danger. Unfortunately for our young onscreen heroes, this version is far less benevolent, somehow stalking multiple corridors of a mental hospital simultaneously in such a slow-moving but surreal way that it will make you feel major claustrophobia. Of all the monsters to appear in the film, the Pale Lady most obviously bears the mark of Guillermo del Toro’s influence. She does the source material justice, but easily could have fit into 2004’s “Hellboy” or 2006’s “Pan’s Labyrinth”. The Pale Lady is almost human in appearance, but it’s ways in which she so clearly is NOT that will make her haunt you in your dreams.