All the Heathers: the Musical Songs: RANKED!
#20: “Blue”
Top 3 Things You Need to Know About the Super Blue Blood Moon
If you’re unfamiliar with this song, you probably haven’t heard the original Off-Broadway soundtrack. It appears during the scene where Veronica fights off Kurt and Ram’s advances. Despite its bleak subject matter, the tune is rather light-hearted and gives off super problematic “boys will be boys” vibes. Understandably, some fans found this offensive and thought the writers were trivializing a serious and still very prevalent issue. The writers told Playbill that “Blue” was on their list of songs that needed to be changed or eliminated, but they’d simply run out of time. Given their audiences’ polarized feedback, its inclusion in the musical was short-lived and soon replaced, but more on that later.
#19: “Yo Girl”
Top 10 Best Girl Power Broadway Songs
At this point in the show, the consequences of her entanglement with J.D. really start to haunt Veronica. Her conscience conjures up the ghosts of J.D.’s crimes, to which she became an unwilling accomplice. She also learns that he’d fed her parents lies about her intentions to take her own life and fears she’ll be his next target. Interestingly, the melody of “Yo Girl” mirrors “Meant to be Yours,” which is the following number sung by J.D. In both cases, the characters grapple with intense emotions and frantically seek a way out of their dire situations. However, they both come to drastically different conclusions, leading to the show’s explosive climax.
#18: “Kindergarten Boyfriend”
According to the show’s writers, Laurence O’Keefe and Kevin Murphy, this song was inspired by a real-life Kindergarten love story. One of the writers became engaged to a classmate, only for her family to move away the following year. Similarly, Veronica’s former bestie Martha mourns her lost love and generally despairs over the cruelty of high school. It’s a sweet stripped-down song that really tugs at those heartstrings. The writers noted that the lyrics don’t rhyme as Martha feels too dejected to care about intricacies like that. The entire orchestra only joins in at the end when Martha chooses to leave her pain behind. It’s beautiful, but it makes our hearts ache.
#17: “I Am Damaged”
Top 20 Most Underrated Songs from Popular Musicals
At less than 90 seconds, this is the shortest song on the "Heathers" soundtrack. Even so, its impact is monumental. J.D. admits defeat and realizes this is his final chance at redemption. Throughout the show, he's preached about fixing the world, but at this moment, reality comes crashing down, and he has no choice but to surrender. He pleads with Veronica to live her life to the fullest and make the world a better place in a way he never could. Despite the inevitable, Veronica tries to save him until the very last second, but it's hopeless. In J.D.'s final moments, he declares his love for Veronica one last time.
#16: “Never Shut Up Again”
Top 10 Broadway Songs You Can't Sing In Public
Since “Blue” was replaced in the show, its reprise was removed too. Instead, Heather Duke was given a brand new solo number where she celebrates her self-declared promotion in the social hierarchy. Until now, she’s lived in Heather Chandler’s oppressive shadow, but now she has the red scrunchie and plans to rule the school with an even tighter iron fist than her predecessor. The song’s title is also poignant since Heather Duke was usually the one being told to pipe down by her former late friend. The inclusion of “Never Shut Up Again” meant that each Heather got a solo. This one’s pretty tyrannical, but you’ve got to admit it’s super catchy.
#15: “My Dead Gay Son”
Top 10 Best Broadway Songs to Sing at Karaoke
This song takes inspiration from one of the film’s most recognizable jokes— admittedly not one that has aged well. Ram’s homophobic father changes his tune when he believes his son died feeling ashamed of his sexuality. He berates Kurt’s dad for his hard-heartedness in light of the tragedy and eventually calls out his hypocrisy in an unexpected twist. O’Keefe and Murphy explained that they didn’t want to paint these fathers as “goofy and out of touch.” Instead, they wanted to delve into the complex emotions of parents just learning of their sons’ supposed sexualities and grappling with the grief of losing their children. Still, it’s an upbeat and lively number that chooses to celebrate life and love.
#14: “The Me Inside of Me”
Top 10 Fastest Broadway Songs
After J.D. turns Veronica into his unwilling accomplice, he convinces her to help cover up their crime. They channel Heather Chandler with a note that quickly gets shared around the school. Before her death, Heather was feared, admired, and loathed, but thanks to Veronica and J.D., everyone now thinks she’s a saint. The writers explained that this song was essentially a parody of cheesy charity singles and how society tends to latch onto others’ misfortune and make it about themselves. It’s a poppy show tune with multiple mid-verse key changes and complex vocal arrangements. It’s comically self-aware, self-indulgent, and one of the show’s most challenging ensemble numbers. Well, at least Heather enjoys the attention.
#13: “Lifeboat”
When Mrs. Fleming urges the students to open up about their feelings, only Heather McNamara bravely steps forward. Only she’s quickly chastised by the other students, led by her so-called friend Heather Duke. In this beautifully simple song, she voices her contempt for the savagery of high school politics and a fear of becoming a social outcast despite her popularity. She imagines herself and her classmates crammed into a small lifeboat sailing across a stormy sea. Everyone’s fighting for a place in a metaphor for social acceptance. The ending alludes that McNamara willingly gives up her spot. Perhaps she believed she’d be following in the footsteps of her deceased classmates.
#12: “Shine a Light”
After Kurt and Ram’s funeral, Mrs. Fleming hosts a televised healing session, showing Westerburg’s united and empowered front. Only, she turns it into a huge spectacle that makes us wonder if she genuinely cares about the students’ welfare or if she’s just reveling in the attention. Regardless, this 60s hippie-inspired number is fun and lively with just a touch of desperation from an authority figure trying to prove that they’re “down with the kids.” Murphy and O’Keefe said they drew upon the well-intentioned yet painful assemblies they remembered from their high school days. Later, Heather Duke leads the song’s mean-spirited reprise, manifesting as a nightmarish apparition in Heather McNamara’s subconscious.
#11: “Our Love Is God”
Top 10 Saddest Broadway Love Songs
The song’s title was taken from a famous quote from the black comedy. The writers read between the lines of J.D.’s conceited declaration and created a romantic ballad with a sinister edge. At first, we think they’re just expressing themselves in the overzealous way that teens in love often do. However, as the song builds, we realize J.D’s being very literal about his intentions, and even Veronica starts to notice red flags. It begins as a soft ballad and slowly builds into something more ominous and threatening. By the end, J.D.’s menacing crescendo has our hearts racing. The song marks the end of Act One and leaves us feeling uneasy throughout intermission.
#10: “You're Welcome”
Top 10 Greatest Broadway Swan Songs
Remember how we said “Blue” was replaced with a new song? Well, this is it. Taken from the High School edition of the musical, “You’re Welcome” was a significant improvement over its predecessor. For one thing, this version gives Veronica a voice and reinstates some of her power. While Kurt and Ram continue to be sleazy, Veronica vocalizes her fear and comes up with a plan to get away from these drunken slimeballs. It’s incredibly satisfying when she comes out on top and mockingly tells them that they’re welcome. The song still relies on humor, but at least in this version, Veronica is more empowered. Plus, it’s as much, if not more, of an earworm as its predecessor.
#9: “Fight for Me”
Top 10 Facts About Logan Paul and KSI’s Fight
Veronica’s already intrigued by the broody, mysterious new kid. But when he fights back against jocks Ram and Kurt — and wins, she finds herself all flustered. Veronica questions why she’s so attracted to this enigmatic stranger and why this fight gets her motor running. In short, she has a thing for bad boys. It’s a great song, but Andy Fickman’s brilliant staging really pushes it over the edge. J.D. and the jocks hilariously fight in slow motion while Veronica watches on and sings. It’s a genius way to put the audience in her mindset. There’s some pretty graphic stuff going on, so why are we laughing? We don’t condone fighting, but we can’t look away, either.
#8: “Big Fun”
Top 10 Darkest & Creepiest Songs in Musicals
Initially, the party scene featured a Beastie Boys-inspired number called “Beer and Booze.” It showed Veronica’s disdain for her drunken classmates and her desire to leave high school behind. However, the writers thought it would be better if Veronica enjoyed herself as it would make her subsequent confrontation with Heather Chandler more impactful. “Big Fun,” the name of a fictional band in the movie, served as the perfect title for this party anthem. Rooted in 80s dance music, the teens abandon all inhibitions and just let loose. A lot unfolds during this song, leading to the show’s critical catalyst. Still, there’s no denying how much this tune makes us want to have “Big Fun.”
#7: “Meant to be Yours”
What If Life On Earth Wasn't Meant To Happen? | Unveiled
Despite all the terrible stuff J.D.’s done, he’s always managed to keep a self-righteous collectiveness about him. But Jason Dean is one complex individual, as this song shows. The writers explained that the messy, chaotic melody, with its constant key changes, reflects the character’s mindset at that moment. He’s desperate, angry, sad, and more alone than ever, especially now he thinks Veronica’s dead too. His grief only fuels his determination to restore peace to the status quo, even if it involves taking out his entire school. This drama-filled number leaves us on edge. We wait with bated breath as J.D. vows to plow on with his misguided scheme.
#6: “Freeze Your Brain”
Murphy and O’Keefe hilariously explained that they needed a song to justify why an intelligent girl like Veronica would fall for someone like J.D. So, they borrowed a metaphor from Baudelaire’s “Flowers of Evil” about drinking to numb pain and landed on “Freeze Your Brain.” When J.D. and Veronica run into each other at a 7/11, he tells her that he numbs himself with Slurpee-induced brain freezes. The melody’s hypnotic, but the jarring chord and key changes almost make us feel like we’re the ones with brain freeze. And as J.D. becomes more impassioned, so does the music until it reaches a powerful crescendo. No wonder Veronica hangs onto his every word.
#5: “Beautiful”
Top 10 Beautiful Rainforests
Dear Diary, it’s September 1, 1989, and Veronica despairs over yet another year of high school carnage. The opening number sets the scene, introduces us to key characters, and foreshadows later events. Still, Veronica encourages audiences to strive to make life “Beautiful” for everyone. The song also answers a plot hole from the movie: When did Veronica join the Heathers and why? Murphy and O’Keefe used an asymmetrical beat to perfectly capture the chaotic high school experience Veronica describes. They used a measure of ¾ bars rather than 4/4 so that characters could enter and leave abruptly while new events could unfold at a moment’s notice. That certainly sounds like high school to us.
#4: “I Say No”
Top 10 Motivational I Want Songs in Musicals
This is the moment where Veronica tells J.D. she’s had enough and sets herself free. It’s a powerful and poignant song that slots into the plot so seamlessly that it’s hard to believe it wasn’t there since day one. Still, its inclusion in the West End and subsequent productions is very welcome. Veronica has a lot of big numbers throughout the show, but this one is undoubtedly the most challenging, both vocally and emotionally. She compares her relationship with J.D. to being addicted to something you know is bad for you but insists she’s going to get clean. It’s the final act of defiance we’ve all been waiting for, and it doesn’t come a moment too soon.
#3: “Seventeen”
Is there anything quite like being 17 and in love? Although hopefully, you didn’t have to present your SO with the same ultimatum Veronica gives J.D. In this romantic ballad, she pleads with her boyfriend to stop playing god and instead just enjoy the things 17 years old typically like to do. It’s beautiful and emotional and never fails to tug at our heartstrings. In the end, J.D. promises to try and mend his ways. Unfortunately, this love story is doomed, and J.D. is too far beyond redemption— but Veronica isn’t. “Seventeen” is reprised in the finale as the high schoolers set aside the past and celebrate what it means to be young and free.
#2: “Candy Store”
Even if you haven’t seen “Heathers,” you’ve probably heard “Candy Store,” and what a bop! It’s amazing how we gleefully sing along to a song that essentially justifies being the absolute worst. Heather Chandler convinces Veronica to play a trick on Martha just because she thinks it will be fun. Since Heather Chandler is a leader and not a follower, it was important to the writers that this song stand out. The result was thrashy, fierce, and reflective of Heather C’s domineering personality. Like its lead singer, it compels you to give it your utmost attention. “Candy Store” is undeniably a crowd-pleaser and an earworm you’ll happily let live in your head rent-free.
#1: “Dead Girl Walking”
What If You Wake Up After You're Pronounced Dead? | Unveiled
Excommunicated, ostracized, and frustrated, Veronica walks the streets wondering what awaits her on Monday morning at school. Mid-thought, she comes by J.D.’s window and climbs in, intending to seduce him. This is a pivotal moment in the plot as it begins their tempestuous relationship. O’Keefe and Murphy described the tune as “a melting pot” of genres ranging from AC/DC to Stevie Wonder and even Stephen Sondheim. Plus, any actress who takes on the role must have a robust set of pipes. Veronica reprises the number when she chases after J.D. to stop his explosive plans. Still, nothing compares to the original. It’s powerful, passionate, magnetic, and blows our minds no matter how many times we hear it.
