The 10 WORST Things Donkey Kong Has Ever Done

10 Worst Things Donkey Kong Has Ever Done

Welcome to MojoPlays, and today, were taking a look at the 10 most heinous crimes Donkey Kong ever committed. So, hes finally here, prepared to get sued, and if you have a case, you can charge him, too. Put your claims together, if youre clapping back, as we go after, this monkeys rap. D-K! Donkey Kong! D-K! Donkey Kongs on trial! Ladies and gentlemenwe got him. Its time to put this conniving gorilla behind bars!

Kidnapping Pauline

Mario vs. Donkey Kong series (2004-)

Prior to this spin-off series, DK had already kidnapped Pauline before, but that was technically Cranky Kong. Not sure the reason why he did, but whatever it was, it couldnt have been anywhere near as petty as the new Donkey Kongs reasons in Mario vs. Donkey Kong. On more than a handful of occasions, DK winds up kidnapping Pauline simply because he was not able to get his hands on a Mini-Mario toy. Yes, a toy is the reason for abducting a person. DK, my man, this level of outrage is just inexcusable, especially since resale places like eBay exist.

Replacing Kamek

Mario Kart 64 (1996)

One of the weirdest things about Mario Kart 64s development is that we almost had a completely different character on the roster. Various screenshots and video snippets show that Kamek was originally going to be one of the playable characters, but for some reason, that changed mid-development. Nintendo wanted Donkey Kong in the game instead and wrangled in Rare to obtain assets to make his model. Basically, Kamek had the spot stolen from him and would not get to join the racing fun until Mario Kart Tour, more than twenty years since his planned inclusion. Sure, this is far from a misdemeanor, but one could say this was the start of DKs life of intentional crime.

Getting CapturedTWICE

Donkey Kong Country 2: Diddys Kong Quest (1995) & Donkey Kong Country 3: Dixie Kongs Double Trouble (1996)

After trouncing the likes of King K. Rool in the first Donkey Kong Country, one would think the leader of the bunch would be unstoppable. Really, how could a bunch of brainless Kremlings stand toe-to-toe with him after that? Yet somehow, DK was just stupid enough to let himself get kidnapped in Donkey Kong Country 2, forcing his nephew and his nephews girlfriend to save him. Then, instead of taking precautions, DK lets himself get kidnapped a SECOND time ALONG with his nephew, leaving Dixie and Kiddy Kong, the baby of the family, to save them. At what point does this become blatant disregard for ones own safety? Someone get Peach on the horn; she needs to weigh in on this!

Cheating in Baseball

Mario Superstar Baseball (2005) & Mario Super Sluggers (2008)

According to numerous baseball organizations, a baseball bat must be in the shape of a round and smooth stick made of wood, metal, or composite material with a diameter no bigger than roughly two and a half inches. By that criteria, Donkey Kong has violated the rules of baseball twice as he used a boxing glove instead of a legal bat in both Mario baseball games. Why anyone let him getaway with this is anyones guess, but we suspect one of two scenarios happened: either 1) Lakitu is the worst umpire in baseball history and overlooked this rule, or 2) everyone was too scared to tell DK hey, you cant do that, bro. The ape has soiled the integrity of baseball! He must pay for his crimes!

Establishing the Meta

Mario Kart: Double Dash!! (2003)

One of the interesting aspects of Double Dash!! is that this was the first Mario Kart to include special items unique to certain characters and allow players to use them. Thing is that each characters special item has a higher chance of being given depending on what placement you are in the race. In the case of DK and Diddy Kong, you get Giant Bananas more often when youre in second or first place. With Giant Bananas taking up so much space before splitting off into three smaller peels, the Kongs can easily dominate and oppress other racers without much effort, making them top-tier characters. And so, were charging DK with the crime of establishing a meta in what used to be a simple, fun, and occasionally B-S racing game!

The DK Roulette

Mario Party 5 (2004)

Speaking of B-S, Mario Party has often been known to be more lenient on dumb luck as opposed to skill. Mario Party 5 was a bit more egregious than the others on account of Donkey Kongs role, going from playable character to possible nonsense to give players a free Star. See, when landing on a DK Space, Donkey Kong can start one of three events, one of them being DK Roulette. This event pits DK and the player in a simple game to see who can roll the highest number. More often than not, if the player wins, they receive a Star as their grand prize. Yeah, there is almost no effort in trying to beat DK in this. We wont be too harsh on the ape for this one, though, since it was never integrated in future installments.

Spamming Down B

Super Smash Bros. (1999) & Super Smash Bros. Melee (2001)

No matter how balanced or imbalanced you may find the first two Smash games, we can all agree that casual DK mains were obnoxious. Yes, we are pinning this on the Kong because dealing with his Down B move was outright annoying! If the player kept pressing B while holding down on the analog stick, Donkey Kong could slam the ground and inflict damage for however long he wanted to. This wouldnt have been an issue had his range not covered so much ground between both games! Later Smash games would nerf it to hell, but man, for us older players, DK was a nightmare to endure. Those Giant Donkey Kong fights were especially agitating!

Cheating in Boxing

Punch-Out!! (2009)

Okay, so Donkey Kong may or may not have a clear understanding of the rules of baseball. Maybe hes more honorable in boxing? Nope! DK has as much integrity here as a YouTuber-led charity boxing event. As most folks who watch boxing know, one of the main rules of the sport is that only punches using the knuckles are allowed. Any kind of back-handed punch, overhead punch, double-fist punches, cartwheels, and somersaults are considered illegal. Well, Donkey Kong utilizes every one of these maneuvers, and the ref does nothing to stop him. Is it out of fear? Is it out of sheer negligence? No matter the case, DK should be barred from the world of sports.

Playing God with Peoples Homes

Donkey Kong Bananza (2025)

Now, this isnt just a crime on DKs behalf, but its a crime many of you have committed as well! As we are all no doubt aware of, Donkey Kong Bananza gives you almost complete freedom in tearing apart the environment in however way you see fit. The world is truly your playground. But when peoples homes and lives are at risk, it's a different story. And youre all laughing. Donkey Kong is tearing homes up for his own personal gain, and youre laughing. This alone should prove how much of a menace this banana-muncher truly is, but if youre somehow still not convinced, we have one last damning piece of evidence to provide.

Getting Nintendo into Legal Trouble

Donkey Kong (1981)

Poor old Nintendo was just trying to make history with their first arcade game. And what does Donkey Kong do? Lets get the company in trouble with Universal Studios! The defendant had the audacity to borderline mimic the legendary motion picture King Kong and wound up landing Nintendo in a rather heated lawsuit. The company was accused of trademark infringement due to the similarities between the game and the film. Thankfully, the judge ruled against Universals claims, stating that the movie company had filed the lawsuit in bad faith and that they had no ownership over King Kong. In other words, Donkey Kong was an original work. If thats not enough to throw DK behind bars, then I dont know what will!

Whats the most devious deed youve seen Donkey Kong commit? Let us know down in the comments, and be sure to subscribe to MojoPlays for more great videos everyday!