Top 10 Most Memorable Seinfeld Girlfriends
Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re looking at notable girlfriends that dated Jerry Seinfeld’s character on his classic sitcom. We won’t be including George’s girlfriend Susan Ross for this list. What’s your favorite episode of Seinfeld? Let us know in the comments!
#10: Beth Lukner
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There have been a lot of recognizable faces that have filtered in and out of the “Seinfeld” universe as paramours of Jerry. Debra Messing was one of those faces, portraying Beth Lukner in two episodes, one from season 7 and another from season 8. Lukner dates Jerry in this latter episode, memorably titled “The Yada Yada,” and the two seem to be getting on pretty well. That is, of course, until Lukner’s inner feelings about certain types of people come out while the pair are attending a wedding. Jerry immediately dumps Beth when he learns of these feelings. Messing would go on to star in her own classic sitcom, “Will & Grace.”
#9: Sue Ellen Mischke
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The character of Sue Ellen Mischke is something of an outlier on this list, since - although she did connect with Jerry - she has more of a relationship with Elaine. This relationship, negative though it may be, is so strong, in fact, that Elaine considers Sue Ellen to be her “nemesis.” Much is made early on over Mischke’s refusal to wear a bra, as well as her connection to the “Oh Henry!” candy bar empire. It’s this combination of Jerry, Elaine and Sue Ellen Mischke’s romantic lives that ends up causing her exit from the series as well, when it’s revealed that Elaine once had a relationship with Sue Ellen’s fiance.
#8: Rachel Goldstein
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Let’s be honest: most girlfriend characters on “Seinfeld” were usually plot devices for an episode and rarely stayed on for more than a couple appearances, at best. This is why Rachel Goldstein stands out from the pack, since the character, played by Melanie Smith, appeared in no less than four, count ‘em, four episodes on the series. We realize that Jerry is known for lovin’ ‘em and leavin’ ‘em, but Rachel feels like something different, something steady. They famously make out during a screening of “Schindler’s List,” and it’s Goldstein who accidentally catches George’s, er…”shrinkage.” Jerry may not have been bummed out to see her go (admitting that things usually “even out” for him), but we certainly were.
#7: Meryl
The “Seinfeld” writers may not have cared enough about Meryl to give her a last name during her one-and-done appearance on the show, but we’ll never forget her. Sure, this may be thanks to the fact that Meryl was played by Courteney freakin’ Cox, but her appearance on the episode titled “The Wife” also makes us laugh every time. Meryl’s insistence at referring to herself as Jerry’s spouse in order to receive a laundry discount is hilarious, as is the couple’s running tally on how many “I love you’s” they’ve shared. For our money, we think Meryl should’ve stuck around for a few more episodes. What do you think?
#6: Gwen
The character of Gwen was another “Seinfeld” girlfriend without a last name, but she actually made up for it by having another face. Or, at least, that’s how George refers to her: a “Two-Face” who looks great in certain lights, but less attractive in others. We admit that this plot device feels a bit dated in today’s more body-positive climate, but “Seinfeld” is such an irreverent show that it never feels truly mean-spirited. Instead, this comedy of errors focuses more upon Jerry and Gwen meeting at Monk’s all the time (you know, for the lighting), as well as how Gwen appears unrecognizable to Kramer. It’s sublimely silly stuff.
#5: Laura the Lip Reader
Marlee Matlin is many things. An advocate and champion for representation of the deaf community. An acclaimed and Academy Award-winning actress. An all-time beauty. She’s also one of the many women who’ve dated Jerry Seinfeld, albeit briefly, in the episode titled, you guessed it, “The Lip Reader.” Matlin portrayed a tennis lineswoman that dated Jerry, who was impressed by her ability to read lips. This initial appreciation quickly turns to paranoia, however, and it isn’t long before Jerry dumps Laura the Lip Reader and moves on to greener pastures. Boo, Jerry. Booooo.
#4: Marla Penny
Actress Jane Leeves initially made her mark with brief appearances on “The Benny Hill Show” and “Monty Python’s The Meaning of Life.” Her talent and beauty eventually led her from her native England to America, where she stopped off on “Seinfeld” before nabbing her own recurring sitcom role on “Frasier.” Leeves’ character of Marla Penny was a virgin when she met Jerry, but soon left the comedian after finding out about his, ahem, “contest” with his friends. Penny would later shack up with John F. Kennedy, Jr., of all people, and even returned for the divisive series finale!
#3: Dolores
It’s one of the most memorable running gags in “Seinfeld” history, as well as perhaps the greatest final freeze frame, to boot. On one hand, it’s sort of insulting that Jerry is actually dating Dolores but can’t even be bothered to remember her first name (spoiler alert: she doesn’t have a last name). Then again, the joy is in the journey, as the gang attempts to jog Jerry’s memory, knowing only that Dolores’ name rhymes with a certain part of the female anatomy. The episode runs through a lot of proposed names, from Mulva and Bovary, to Celeste and Gipple, but it’s only at the finale where Jerry screams out his girlfriend’s name from his apartment window.
#2: Jeannie Steinman
It was the character of Jeannie Steinman that initially led to Jerry Seinfeld actually proposing marriage, after the former saves the comic from being hit by a car. Jerry is head-over-heels about Jeannie, noticing they share the same initials, as well as much of the same interests. However, this looming, gray cloud of self-loathing eventually comes over Jerry when he realizes that he simply can’t be with a person who’s exactly like him. There’s honestly a lot to unpack when it comes to the dissolution of the pair’s engagement, but we absolutely loved seeing Janeane Garofalo on this show.
Before we unveil our top pick, here are a few honorable mentions.
Gillian
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Sheila
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Lois
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Sgt. Cathy Tierney
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Jane
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#1: Sidra Holland
The success of “Seinfeld” allowed for a number of its jokes and gags to enter the public consciousness. However, most of them were uttered by the core gang of Jerry, Elaine, Kramer or George. Teri Hatcher’s Sidra Holland was a pleasant and notable outlier to this trend, uttering one of the sitcom’s most famous lines, full stop. The bulk of Sidra Holland’s screen time is associated with her breasts, specifically the question of whether they’re natural or surgically-enhanced. Sidra and Jerry’s relationship is off and on during this episode, but it’s Holland that ultimately has the last laugh, when she reveals to Jerry: [1]
