Top 10 Inappropriate Moments in Kids Video Games

“Super Mario Kart” (1991)

Though much of the “Mario Kart” series is nothing but harmless fun (save for the times when someone rages after getting hit with a Blue Shell), there was a time when Mario and company were a little more adult. Well, at least in Japan. Both Peach and Bowser’s victory animations see them enjoying a bottle of champagne to celebrate their victory. These animations were removed from the North American release on account of drinking ages in the US and Canada, as well as Nintendo of America’s policy on featuring alcohol in their games. It wasn’t family-friendly for Western audiences, so it was removed from the game.

“Pokemon Red & Blue” (1996)

When exploring Viridian City, players will find an old man sprawled in the middle of the walkway and are unable to walk past him. According to his grandson, grandpa has been grumpy because he hasn’t had his coffee yet. However, the Japanese version tells a different story. This time, we learn that the old man is completely drunk and needs coffee in order to sober up. Of course, we can understand why this change was made, and it was probably for the same reasons why “Super Mario Kart” had its champagne references removed.

“Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga” (2003)

The first game in the “Mario & Luigi” series starts off on a really adult note with its dark intro. It only gets more adult when the player gains control for the first time. As Toad, the player must explore Mario and Luigi’s house to find our plucky plumber. It isn’t until he approaches the shower when he hears Mario singing. Instead of, you know, knocking or yelling for Mario outside, Toad waltzes on him and freaks out from seeing Mushroom Kingdom’s hero in a not-so-heroic situation. Kids might laugh at Toad being disgusted by Mario’s chest hair, but older players know Toad was traumatized by something else.

“Mario Party 2” (1999)

We have yet another regional difference between Japanese and Western versions, but this time, it’s in one of the classic “Mario Party” games. In “Mario Party 2”, players can compete in Western Land for the chance to take on the outlaw, Bowser the Brash. Western audiences saw Bowser and the winner dueling with pop guns and shooting corks at each other. The Japanese version, on the other hand, had the characters use actual revolvers. Would Western audiences have liked seeing Mario and the gang literally putting a bullet in Bowser? Probably not then, but today’s audience would probably find it hilarious. I mean, NO, we must think of the children!

“Kirby’s Dream Land 2” (1995)

It’s time we realize that Kirby isn’t the insanely cute and innocent little puyo we’ve been led to believe. We only need one shred of evidence to prove that notion! Exhibit A - “Kirby’s Dream Land 2”!! In the final level of Red Canyon, Kirby will enter a room where the blocks are arranged in a very particular order. Of course, it doesn’t look like much with the Game Boy’s screen, but when the room is fully assembled and scaled, it reveals the true pattern - a smiling naked lady. How this got past even Nintendo of America’s censors is beyond us!

“Mega Man Legends” (1998)

Let’s take a break from Nintendo games for a brief moment. Some PlayStation games aren’t any better at hiding adult jokes in E-rated games. Take Capcom’s “Mega Man Legends”. There is a moment where Volnutt can enter Roll’s room while she’s taking a bath. While we don’t ever see her, it’s not this bit that we’re concerned about - it’s the aftermath. Roll gives Volnutt an earful and yells at him to leave. Sure, Volnutt looks ashamed and embarrassed, but when he finally leaves, the little delinquent does a quick fist pump like he just achieved something! The sheer audacity!! That was no “accident”!!

“Super Mario Strikers” (2005)

One of the bits that made “Super Mario Strikers” so memorable was the change in tone compared to most Mario games. This one had some grit and attitude behind it! For parents, there may have been a bit too much grit and attitude, especially when our lord and savior Waluigi was onscreen. When scoring a goal, Waluigi will sometimes get carried away and celebrate with a crotch chop. Yeah, that was not a sight we were anticipating, and the pelvic thrusting certainly doesn’t help us forget the image. We’re sure the internet doesn’t mind it, though.

“Banjo-Tooie” (2001)

This one is a bit more explicit than the other Nintendo games. Kids may not put two and two together, but the adults will see it and can never unsee it. While exploring the prehistoric environments of TerrydactylLand, players will come across a small, swampy area with a narrow path of rocks going down the middle. Only thing is that this path of rocks looks a little bulbous and flaccid, don’t you think? Like we said, you will never unsee it. Hey, what else would you expect from a series known for the occasional innuendo?

“Paper Mario: The Thousand-Year Door” (2004)

Speaking of steamy moments in Nintendo games, the “Paper Mario” series is blushing in the corner as we speak. We know exactly why, too. “The Thousand-Year Door” shows a scene where Peach is exploring the rooms of the place where she’s being held captive. One of these rooms holds a shower and is interactive. Kids will most likely think nothing of it, it’s just someone taking a bath or a shower. For an adult passing by, though? Censors are most likely kicking into overdrive. (Man, the Mushroom Kingdom will shower through any crisis, huh?)

“Ratchet & Clank” (2002)

Granted, “Ratchet & Clank” isn’t exactly a kids game as it is rated T for Teen, but any normal parent would flip if this appeared on their kid’s screen, regardless of age. In the original “Ratchet & Clank” for PlayStation 2, there’s a really weird glitch that, for some reason, affects Starlene. Just start flip-jumping around her like a madman while strafing and her cleavage will grow…somehow. Yeah, video game logic. Also, yes, this is possible in the PS3 HD port. Why this happens is a mystery to everyone including the developers themselves.